Tag Archive : Game

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Games Within Games – Emulated Classics, Enhanced Ports, and Bonus Discs / MY LIFE IN GAMING

[ TRY ] Everyone loves a good deal. That’s why game companies have been bundling
popular titles together since decades ago. Today, compilations of classic games have
become some of the most reliable and accessible methods of exploring the history of various
series and publishers. But sometimes you’ll find a classic game
included with a brand-new game a bonus. These extras may be listed as a bullet point
on the back of the box, but are generally not presented as a selling point that overshadows
the main game. Let’s take a closer look at some of these
“games within games” because it’s easy to forget that some of these were even there
in the first place. Heck, you never know, maybe we’ll discover
some of the best ways to play some of the most significant games in history… or maybe…
the worst. [ MUSIC: “Principle” by Matt McCheskey
] [ Turbo Out Run Music ] [ COURY ] Developers have been sneaking in
extra games for a long time. In an age where most games can be downloaded
in seconds to play on real hardware or emulators, it can be easy to forget that it used to be
pretty novel when an extra game was included as a bonus. Afterall, most were once full priced games
themselves, so it felt like a huge deal to get them for “free.” We’re gonna be looking a whole bunch of
these types of in this episode, but what exactly is our criteria that justifies a “Game within
a game?” I’m guessing that many people thought of
Super Mario Bros. and Duck Hunt when they first saw the title of this episode… but
both games are given equal billing on the package. We aren’t counting any games that are specifically
labeled as collections or compilations. Others may have thought of the “Battle Game”
in Super Mario 3., which can be directly accessed from the Mario 3 title screen in Super Mario
All-Stars. This may look like the Mario Bros. arcade
game, but in practice, it’s too different to truly consider it the same game – it’s
just a mini-game… a pretty fun one, though. The same can be said with the Gradius game
in Mystical Ninja… or Fantasy Zone in Arnold Palmer Golf. At a glance, these look like the originals,
but they’re radically reduced – only one tiny level each – so they’re just fun easter
eggs. Super Mario Bros. Deluxe for the Game Boy
Color gets close with its “Super Mario Bros. for Super Players,” which is essentially
Super Mario Bros. 2, A.K.A. The Lost levels… but it’s incomplete – graphical
and mechanical alterations aside, worlds 9 and A through D are not present, so we wouldn’t
consider it a suitable replacement for the real thing. That said, the kind of examples we’ll be
looking at can be summed up nicely by Pitfall: The Mayan Adventure. This 1994 sequel slash revival features incredible
animation and was released on just about every console at the time. [ Pitfall! Game Audio ] By entering a button code on the title screen,
you can relive the influential Atari 2600 Pitfall! adventure, which is visually faithful
– that shouldn’t be hard – but the sound isn’t exactly the greatest. Unfortunately, the original Pitfall seems
to have been omitted from the 2001 Game Boy Advance release. [ Pitfall! Game Audio ] Hidden games are good and all, but probably
the most common occurance of games within games is as a reward for beating a game’s
story mode, or overcoming certain challenges along the way. One of my favorite examples of this is in
the Ninja Gaiden reboot on the Xbox. Hidden throughout the game are the original
trilogy of games. Except, these aren’t the NES versions as
you’d expect – for some reason, Team Ninja decided to include the Super NES remakes that
were part of Ninja Gaiden Trilogy. [ Ninja Gaiden Trilogy Game Audio ] This was maybe not the greatest choice, but
it’s certainly an interesting one and I can appreciate that. These games are definitely inferior to the
NES entries in just about every aspect, most notably in the sound department. The melodies just didn’t jive with the SNES’s
sample based sound. [ Ninja Gaiden Trilogy Game Audio ] Despite that, the game supports 480p and so
do these versions. Everything appears to be scaled correctly,
with no scrolling shimmer that I noticed. Although they each game does appear to be
slightly desaturated, it works with in their favor, giving them a sort of look akin to
an original non 1CHIP SNES console. The presence of passwords were a nice quality
of life addition to the SNES game and by extension here as well. These games are of decent length, so having
them incorporated here is quite welcome. [ Ninja Gaiden Trilogy Game Audio ] These games were removed from the release
of Ninja Gaiden Black, and replaced with the vastly inferior arcade game… I’d love to show that to you as well, but
I don’t have a save with it unlocked. Regardless, the arcade game is a step down
from the NES trilogy in every respect, making this a compelling reason to own both Ninja
Gaiden Black AND the original release. Not to mention, none of these bonus games
make an appearance in the PlayStation 3 Sigma release. [ Ninja Gaiden Trilogy Game Audio ] Not all of these are within the game itself. There’s several instances where the developer
has bundled a bonus disc with an additional game on it in the package. The US release of Strider 2 on the PlayStation
1 included the arcade game on it’s own disc. [ Strider – Level 2 Arranged Music ] When most people address this release, it’s
always all about how the disc art was reversed – Strider 2 was on the disc labelled Strider
and vice-versa. While this is a fun anecdote, what they should
really be talking about is how this is essentially the best version of the first Strider to ever
be released on the home market. [ Strider Game Audio ] Built from the ground up, it’s supposedly
an arcade perfect port with all of the animation and music intact. The only real downfall being a loading screen
between each level… which isn’t even that disruptive in the first place. After you beat the game, you gain access to
a number of bonus options such as remixed music and the ability to customize Strider
Hiryu with different colored outfits. It seems like there was a lot of love put
into this port and the additions make it more than just a simple arcade conversion. [ Strider Game Audio ] Now that you have a better understanding of
what we’re looking for, let’s look at how Nintendo’s taken advantage of their
classic titles over the years. [ DK64 Rap ] [ TRY ] By the late 90s, game consoles had
become capable enough to emulate classic games, so it wasn’t uncommon to see developers
dig into their back catalogs to include nice little bonuses without having to fully port
their older games to new hardware. With a rich history of releases to draw from,
Nintendo began to dabble in including some of their older games with new releases. Donkey Kong 64 is one of the N64’s most
massive games. Rare’s attempt to convert Donkey Kong Country
into a 3D platformer pushed the limits of attention spans by packing the world full
of so many collectibles that finishing the game can take more time than an RPG. Among the game’s many bonuses are two important
titles from both the histories of Rare and Nintendo. Ever the vocal advocate for the earliest generations
of gaming, Cranky Kong will begin to challenge the player to beat his high score in Jetpac
after a certain point in the game – in fact, doing so is required to even finish the main
game. Jetpac was developed for the ZX Spectrum by
brothers and Rare co-founders Tim and Chris Stamper, their first game released under their
previous company name “Ultimate Play the Game.” The game is represented quite cleanly in DK64,
especially with the Ultra HDMI mod, as shown here. Jetpac has been remade and emulated on Xbox
platforms as well, but this remains the game’s only official appearance on Nintendo hardware. [ Jetpac Game Audio ] The original Donkey Kong can also be found
in DK64’s Frantic Factory level. As with Cranky Kong’s Jetpac challenge,
the rewards for finishing Donkey Kong must be collected to beat DK64. [ Donkey Kong Arcade Jingle ] This version is notable for actually being
based on the original arcade release, which Nintendo has only sparsely republished over
the years, instead favoring the NES port, which is lacking the arcade game’s second
level – the cement factory. The vertical scaling is a bit off here compared
to Jetpac, which is most apparent when Mario is riding an elevator in stage 3. The sound is also a bit muffled and distorted,
but I like to think that’s a conscious artistic choice. [ Donkey Kong Game Audio ] So with the N64, it was starting to become
viable for Nintendo to use emulation commercially. A number of these early emulation experiments
would continue to appear over the course of the early 2000s. Now, a few of these, like Ocarina of Time
and Master Quest, and the Zelda Collector’s Edition, were given away in separate packages
as pre-order and registration incentives, so those don’t really count, but other examples
of emulation did appear as bonuses in the games themselves. [ Animal Crossing Music ] Dobutsu no Mori or “Animal Forest” was
one of the last games released for the N64 in Japan – a strange new concept of a “communication
game” that at the time seemed like a gamble. Of note, a handful of Famicom games could
be acquired for play in the player’s house. The GameCube port, titled Dobutsu no Mori
Plus, was localized as “Animal Crossing” for western markets and includes several more
Famicom games. These appear as NES consoles in the overseas
versions and can be obtained through various means. Unfortunately, most of these don’t represent
the NES’s finest work, consisting primarily of the very early “black box” titles. But you know, even if these aren’t my favorite
NES games, they were absolutely the most exciting items to find in the game, at least to me. [ Wario’s Wood Game Audio ] One outlier to the early NES theme is Wario’s
Woods (possibly my favorite puzzle game of all time) which can only be found on the Game
Boy Advance link cable island. The GBA connection could also be used with
the eReader to acquire a couple of other games, but sadly it looks like I never ended up with
those in my card packs. You could even load the games up for play
on your GBA independent of your GameCube, years before the Classic NES Series cartridges
hit the system! A handful of more exciting games are hidden
in Animal Crossing’s code, including Punch-Out, Super Mario Bros., and The Legend of Zelda,
which were reserved for Nintendo giveaways, although we’ve struggled to find concrete
info on this, and internet hearsay suggests the Zelda giveaway never happened. I haven’t tried it myself, but it seems
like all games can be obtained through the use of a cheat device like an Action Replay. Now, speaking of playing NES games on the
GameCube and Game Boy Advance, Nintendo made sure that no one with these systems was lacking
for options to play the original Metroid. [ Metroid Prime Music ] After being missing in action for a generation,
Samus made her triumphant return in November 2002 with two new games: the daring first-person
Metroid Prime on GameCube and the sprite-based Metroid Fusion on Game Boy Advance. Ironically, it was Metroid Prime that more
closely adhered to the series formula, but after beating Metroid Fusion it’s possible
to unlock the original Metroid on GameCube by connecting Fusion to Prime via the link
cable. Unfortunately, this version puts jump on B
and shoot on A, and that just ain’t right. I get why they did it, since those are the
controls in Metroid Prime, but it feels real bad for an NES game. Metroid is playable on the GBA system itself
with Fusion’s followup, Metroid Zero Mission, which is itself a reimagining of the NES original. Metroid is unlocked by simply beating Zero
Mission. Of course, compromises are inevitable whenever
shrinking down 240p games to the 160p GBA resolution, but no matter how you play it,
the original Metroid is still fun if you get your head in a place where you can enjoy the
challenge of an open world with no in-game map. [ Metroid Game Audio ] [ Super Punch-Out Music ] Another classic Nintendo game is included
with a rather unlikely title… Fight Night Round 2 by EA Sports. To be honest, I could not figure out how to
play this game at all… it just feels unresponsive to me… but you know what boxing game does
feel great to play? How about we switch over to Super Punch-Out
instead? Now this is more like it! But unfortunately, the sound emulation is
some of the worst I’ve ever heard. [ Super Punch-Out Audio Comparison ] Still, the game is playable enough. Super Punch-Out may not be as popular as Mike
Tyson’s Punch-Out among the general populace, but it’s an excellent sequel that should
be played any way you can get your hands on it. [ Super Punch-Out Game Audio ] [ Sonic Adventure Music ] [ COURY ] When Sega went third party in the
early 2000s, they had a whole new audience for that had never played some of their games. However, they knew they had to have some sort
of hook to ease older fans into this brave new reality. In a show of good faith, Sega added new content
to many of their ports. On the GameCube, Skies of Arcadia Legends
added new story content while Sonic Adventure 2 supplemented the lengthy campaign with a
new 2-player battle mode. When they finally got around to the first
Sonic Adventure, Sonic Team dropped in a slew of Game Gear Sonic games for players to toy
with. Getting most of these unlockables is pretty
easy if you just play through the main adventure normally, triggering as you hit certain Emblem
milestones. There’s 12 games total here, giving you
a complete list of portable Sonic games in one fell swoop. Sonic Adventure supports 480p, and these games
tend to look pretty good. Since Game Gear games are natively 160 x 144,
it would look a bit too narrow on a TV, so Sonic Team decided to stretch these a bit
wider horizontally. Because of this, you get a bit of shimmer
on the horizontal axis, but it’s not too bad. Most Sonic games are so fast that this will
go unnoticed – it’s only when you slow down that it becomes apparent. Outside of that, these games are generally
emulated well. The enormous borders have been cropped out,
and the PSG sound is fairly accurately reproduced. [ Game Gear vs GameCube Comparison ] The only egregious issue that really stuck
out to me was that Tails Adventure was insanely dark for some reason. If you go to the main Option Menu, and switch
the language to Japanese, the Game Gear ROMs will also switch over to their Japanese counterpart. That’s a neat little bonus, and a cool subversion
of my expectations. [ Sonic Game Gear Game Audio ] Sonic games felt right at home on a console
like the GameCube, but over on the Xbox, Sega was delivering some graphically intense sequels
in the form of Jet Set Radio Future and more importantly Panzer Dragoon Orta, which… I’m just sayin’… is my favorite game
on the system. [ Panzer Dragoon Orta Game Audio ] This is a game that is absolutely packed with
bonus features, like artwork, mini games, and an entirely separate extra campaign. But if that wasn’t enough, when you finish
the main game you can open up the entire original Panzer Dragoon, which is kind of insane considering
that only just came out during the previous generation. [ Panzer Dragoon Title Screen Music ] The version included here is a port of the
PC version instead of the Saturn original, which makes sense considering the Xbox hardware’s
closer relation to that environment. Whether or not this is a good thing depends
on what you’re looking for. A number of graphical flourishes, such as
the water in the first stage has been altered. Like the main game, it’ll run at 480p if
you’re playing on an Xbox that supports it for this game, although keep in mind that
it’s a strictly 4:3 game, while the main Orta game supports 16:9, so don’t forget
to set your TV to the correct aspect ratio. But perhaps most obvious hit against this
version is the heavy filtering of the entire game, making it look soft and blurry compared
to the original. [ Panzer Dragoon Game Audio ] Of course in 2002, this sort of approach was
commonplace when it came to emulating or porting older games to newer hardware. The anti-dithering crowd won’t mind at all
because this helps to smooth out the heavy dithering present – most apparent in the view
cone in HUD. Being an exclusive S-Tier game on the system,
it’s no shock that Panzer Dragoon Orta was selected to be among the games that were made
backwards compatible on not only the Xbox360, but in spectacular 4K60 on the Xbox One X. [ Panzer Dragoon Orta Game Audio ] Playing Orta in 4K really drives home just
how timeless of a game it is. The art direction holds up extremely well,
and it just about every frame looks like a painting. But how does well does the unlockable original
game make the jump to this new version? Well, for a PC port running on an Xbox, which
is in turn running on an Xbox One… it’s not bad at all. [ Panzer Dragoon Level 1 Music ] It’s basically what you’d expect: a 4K scaled
version of the Xbox game – heavy filtering and all. No increased frame rate here, but it’s not
glitchy or anything either – at least that I’ve seen. The only real catch here is that it’s forced
to 16:9 due to the 4K upscale. Now, to be fair, this doesn’t exactly destroy
the integrity of the look, but considering the stellar work of Microsoft’s backwards
compatibility team, part of me was hoping for the proper aspect ratio to be retained. [ Panzer Dragoon Game Audio ] Alright, so how about Sega’s arcade games? Prolific game designer Yu Suzuki included
a number of his super scaler arcade games in Shenmue that not only aided with the mid-80’s
immersion, but also gathered some of the most influential games of all time under one roof. Sit down and give ‘em a shot… for one
hundred yen per play. [ Shenmue Game Audio: “Guess I’ll try
it…”] Hang-On was the first Super Scaler game released,
and while it’s often overlooked in favor of it’s sequel, Super Hang-On, it’s influence
cannot be denied. Being present in Shenmue makes sense because
Suzuki directed the first game while he only served as producer for the follow up. Also, this is one of, if not the only, officially
released arcade accurate port of the original game. The other three games that appear across both
games, Space Harrier, Out Run and After Burner 2 are cornerstones of Sega’s arcade history
that have been re-released and ported all over the place. On the Dreamcast, I was pleasantly surprised
to see that Space Harrier, Out Run and After Burner 2 all output at 240p, although they
do seem to be a touch darker and desaturated than I’d like. Still, this is great if you’re after something
a bit more authentic. Unfortunately Hang-On seems to be 480i and
I’m not quite sure why. [ Hang-On Game Audio ] However, all four games do support progressive
scan through a VGA box or 480p capable cable. This will help a lot with HDTVs, but if you
have a DCHDMI mod installed in your Dreamcast? Dang, these games look razor sharp. [ After Burner II Game Audio ] Shenmue 2 was later ported to the original
Xbox in 2002, with the same game in tow. Since the Xbox doesn’t officially support
240p, all these are forced to either 480i or 480p depending on your video output settings. The overall image has been brightened up a
bit, and the audio has been tweaked a bit to sound fuller. Everything remains pretty sharp, with Hang-On
being a touch softer than the others. [ Out Run Game Audio ] But, how about the recent Shenmue 1 & 2 HD
re-release? D3t handled these remasters to to decent results
overall… after a healthy dose of patches. I was curious to see how the arcade games
would be emulated here… I’m assuming that both games use the same
emulation, because they generally look the same, however there are certain aspects that
makes me unsure if that’s the case. The first game puts some reverb on certain
sound effects to make them sound like they’re inside of a real arcade [ Space Harrier Game Audio ] While these are appreciated, they don’t
seem to be present in the second game. [ Space Harrier Game Audio ] Hang on looks to be a 4X scale of the original
and is ultra sharp. Space Harrier and Out Run look as though they’re
4.5X scales, which isn’t as pixel perfect, but it doesn’t cause any major shimmering
issues due to the Z-Axis perspective. Unfortunately none of these are going to be
playable in Shenmue 3, which is understandable, but a bummer nonetheless.Still, chances are
if you’re a big fan of Shenmue, then you’re most likely familiar with the series that
picked up and carried it’s torch in more ways than one. [ Space Harrier Game Audio ] [ Yakuza Music ] [ TRY ] The Yakuza series has resonated with
gamers of all types ever since the original entry on PS2 – and Sega has been more than
happy to provide hungry fans with more. I have to admit, the grand scale of the ongoing
story has intimidated me for years – that is a lot of game to get through – so I took
the 1980s prequel – Yakuza 0 – as my way to give the series a taste test. While Yakuza is considered by many to be a
spiritual successor to Shemue, I prefer to liken it to River City Ransom – an open world
that is equal parts serious and goofy where you beat up punks, money flows, and fast food
is your source of never-ending strength. But one cue it most certainly takes from Shenmue
are its Sega arcades. Famed emulation developer M2 has long handled
the series’ arcade titles – I had a great time playing Space Harrier and Out Run in
Yakuza 0… but other entries in the series even include Puyo Puyo and some of the Virtua
Fighter games. The Yakuza team has a habit of sneaking classics
into other games they’ve developed, such as Judgment and First of the North Star: Lost
Paradise, in which you can find many arcade games scattered across the wasteland. [ Fist of the North Star Lost Paradise Game
Audio ] You can even use a Sega Master System in Kenshiro’s
apartment that plays one of the very earliest Fist of the North Star video games – this
is the first time that this version has been released outside Japan with the Fist of the
North Star license. It was previously localized as “Black Belt”
and was quite a different game. I just love how the enemies explode. [ Hokuto no Ken Game Audio ] The technical wizards from German-American
development studio Factor 5 built their brand on the Turrican franchise, but rose to higher
prominence with their technically impressive and critically acclaimed Star Wars titles
for Nintendo 64, PC, and GameCube. Rogue Squadron II: Rogue Leader was a miracle
of a third-party launch title for the GameCube – including both the battles of Yavin and
Endor, leaving few ideas for a potential sequel. [ Rebel Strike Title Screen Music ] As such, Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike
released in 2003 to a tepid reception that was further marred by unimpressive on-foot
gameplay. Nonetheless, Rebel Strike offers a trio of
enticing bonuses – emulations of the classic Star Wars arcade games. Star Wars Arcade and The Empire Strikes Back
Arcade are unlocked through normal progression through the main missions. [ Star Wars Arcade Audio ] Both were originally designed for vector monitors,
so 480p on the GameCube really can’t replicate the true look – it’s a bit dark, but still,
this is a convenient way to play these impressive early 3D titles. [ The Empire Strikes Back Arcade Audio ] Return of the Jedi Arcade is unlocked by entering
a password. [ Return of the Jedi Arcade Audio ] [ Rampage Total Destruction Music ] Rampage: Total Destruction was developed by
Foundation 9 and released for the PlayStation 2, GameCube, and Wii in 2006. This is a polygon-based interpretation of
Midway’s classic Rampage series, and like its predecessors, there’s not much to it,
but if you’re looking to shut off your brain and indulge in some mindless mayhem, you could
certainly do worse. [ Rampage Total Destruction Game Audio ] But if you prefer the older titles, Total
Destruction also offers emulations the original Rampage and Rampage: World Tour – fittingly,
the emulation is handled by Digital Eclipse, which at the time was part of Foundation 9. The first game is a slow-paced 1986 arcade
title… while the World Tour is a much faster game, which I definitely prefer. The scaling is far from perfect, although
the softness of World Tour’s graphics seem to prevent visible shimmering. Certain elements of the graphics of both games
appear to be drawn at a higher resolution, so I wanted to see what would happen if I
forced 480p using the GameCube homebrew utility Swiss. Interestingly, booting each game from the
title menu after forcing 480p resets the output to 480i, but Swiss can also directly access
two other boot launchers on the disc – both of which display an extremely interesting
list of games. Unfortunately, none of them load aside from
the Rampage titles, but booting from this menu was the only way I was able to use 480p
with the arcade titles, at least on the GameCube. [ Ramage World Tour Game Audio ] Contra 4 by WayForward is perhaps the best
action game for the Nintendo DS – a supremely satisfying run & gun from a team that simply
knows how to make a game that looks, sounds, and plays as Contra should. [Contra 4 Level 1 Music ] Fittingly, two of the NES classics that inspired
Contra 4 are included as unlockables for clearing missions in the game’s Challenge Mode. The NES version of Contra is one of the best
8-bit games ever made. While there are noticeable audio hiccups and
neither of the scaling options available can really make up for the DS’s screen being
a bit too low res for NES games, the fact that this game was included at all ended up
being quite significant. That’s because, following Contra 4, Konami
failed to re-release NES Contra on any of Nintendo’s Virtual Console platforms, or
even the NES Classic Edition. And its scarcity on modern platforms has been
a real shame. It wasn’t until the Contra Anniversary Collection
that the game finally reemerged. [ Contra Game Audio ] Contra 4 also includes the NES version of
Super C – a solid sequel that’s just a bit less classic. This is the game that Konami has consistently
used to represent the series’ NES era on Virtual Console and on the NES Classic Edition
in lieu of Contra 1, which has probably made some fans a bit bitter. But in spite of imperfect emulation, NES games
being playable on the DS was a nice novelty in 2007. [ Super C Game Audio ] When it comes to packing games full of extras,
the one developer that immediately comes to mind is Namco. Especially during the PlayStation 1 and 2
eras, they really set a standard for unlockables that has perhaps never quite been matched
since. [Ridge Racer Type 4 Intro Audio ] [ COURY ]I already mentioned Panzer Dragoon
Orta’s crazy list of unlockable content earlier in the episode. But when it comes to sheer amount of bonus
material, no developer delivered more consistently than Namco on the PlayStation 1 and 2. [Ridge Racer Type 4 Intro Audio ] Ridge Racer was the first game that gave Sega
a real challenger when it came to racing game dominance. In a sign of things to come, the PS1 port
featured a mini version of Namco’s arcade classic Galaxian as a way to help players
pass the time during load screens. Before development of Ridge Racer Type 4,
the team behind it did extensive research on just how viable 480i, 60 frames per second
would be for the new game. Although the PS1 version of Tekken 3 was able
to achieve this, R4 was just going to be too much for the hardware. Instead of letting this research to waste,
they put the tech to good use in an enhanced version of the first game called Ridge Racer
Turbo Mode. With R4 being the final entry one the PlayStation
one, Namco included Turbo mode on a bonus disc in the same package, putting a bow on
the first generation of Ridge Racer. [ Ridge Racer Music ] The higher res makes it look especially crisp
on a CRT and the higher framerate is immediately apparent. What’s cool is that they also included a
pared down version of the original, NON Turbo Ridge Racer on the same disc so you can observe
just how far development improved over the systems lifespan. [ Ridge Racer Music ] Tekken 5 arrived on the PlayStation 2 in 2005,
just in time to celebrate the series tenth anniversary. In order to put a cap on a series that was
always pushing the PlayStation hardware, Namco went all out with the bonus content here. Taking a cue from the PS1 release of Ridge
Racer, you can play an arcade during the loading screen.This time it’s the 1991 first person
rail shooter Star Blade. While the loading screen just gives you a
taste of battle, the entire game can be unlocked and is playable in the Arcade History section. [ Star Blade Game Audio ] Believe it or not, this was the first time
that an arcade accurate version of Star Blade made it’s way to home consoles. There were versions on the Sega CD and other
disc based consoles, but nothing remotely as close as this. [ Star Blade Game Audio ] Filling out the rest of Tekken 5’s Arcade
History is not only the arcade version of Tekken 1, but Tekken 2 AND Tekken 3. [ Tekken 3 Intro Music ] Although I’m sure some fans were sad that
they’re the arcade versions and no the PS1 ports, but c’mon – this is an insane lineup
here. [ Tekken 2 Game Audio ] The first two games even display at an accurate
240p, while Tekken 3 is obviously at 480i like it should be. [ Tekken 3 Game Audio ] Although I am not super experienced with all
of these games, I feel like they run exceptionally well here. [ Tekken Game Audio ] The
level of care that went into representing and preserving these versions is admirable,
and fills out a great package, both when it was released… and now. But on the other side of the coin, you’ve
got something like this… Back in 1989, Konami struck gold with their
4 player Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles arcade game. So when Konami got the license back in 2003
to make games based around the recent cartoon reboot, I was excited to see what they’d
do with it even though I had no interest in the new show. [ TMNT Show Theme ] Three new games followed… and to say these
didn’t live up to expectations would be an understatement. [ TMNT 3 Game Audio ] But there was a silver lining. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2: Battle Nexus
had the original 1989 arcade game as an unlockable – hopefully giving me an arcade perfect version
at home that I’d always dreamed of. While this version look and plays about how
I’d expect for 2004, the real problem lays in the audio. Due to licensing issues, all of the voices
have been removed – which I suppose does make sense… but the music is all gone too – replaced
by a single music track that is used on every single level. [ TMNT “Arcade “ Game Audio ] And it’s horrible. It just doesn’t work at all for this version
of the game. The combination of the removed voices and
replaced music absolutely decimates the experience of the game – making it feel oddly empty and
lifeless. [ TMNT “Arcade “ Game Audio ] The following year, Konami bundled Turtles
2: Turtles in Time as a bonus with TMNT 3: Mutant Nightmare, which fares significantly
better. But, because the Super NES version of Turtles
in Time is so good, if not better than the arcade, the allure of owning this version
isn’t quite a strong. It doesn’t have the original soundtrack,
but at least each stage has different, more appropriate, music. [ TMNT 2 “Arcade “ Game Audio ] Voices are also changed, but it seems to be
a re-recording of the same lines… although the acting quality is exceptionally bad. [ TMNT 2 VO Comparison ] Both Turtles games are, disappointingly, 480i
only – even on the Xbox. Forcing to 480p using GSM on the PlayStation
2 does work and naturally looks much better. I didn’t have the Cube version on hand to
test with Swiss. [ TMNT 2 “Arcade “ Game Audio ] When I graduated high school, I spent a few
years working for Electronics Boutique. While I was busy enjoying Castlevania Symphony
of the Night and Final Fantasy 7, a co-worker was obsessed with getting the most of his
PC and 3D Accelerator cards to get the best possible experience playing Quake 2. His enthusiasm eventually rubbed off on me
and suddenly I was spending too much money upgrading my computer with a Voodoo 3 so that
I could play… you guessed it. Quake 2. [ Quake 2 Music ] Years later, I had an itch to revisit Quake
2 and after searching for ways to play it on newer hardware I discovered that there
was a little known Xbox 360 port bundled with the special edition of Quake 4 from around
when the console launched in 2005. As it turns out that this is a pretty amazing
version of the game, and is self contained on it’s own DVD to boot – in a paper sleeve,
sure, but I’ll take it. And get this, not only is this version in
1080p, but it also runs at 60 frames per second… which isn’t even something that Xbox360
really had the ability to do until years after release. [ Quake 2 Game Audio ] It’s gorgeous, silky smooth and never seems
to drop frames or slow down at all. These days, it’s refreshing to play a first
person shooter driven by simplicity. No melee attacks, kill streaks or even having
to reload. Revisiting Quake 2 has been a complete joy. [ Quake 2 Game Audio ] Of course, some people will find the idea
of playing Quake 2 with a controller absolutely blasphemous. There was a time when I’d be right there
along with them – but the fact is, I don’t have the patience or the desire to sit at
my PC and play games with a mouse and keyboard these days. And get this: There’s also an option for networking
and split screen deathmatch for up to 8 players! I don’t have anyone to play with, but it’s
cool that it’s there. So sure, Quake 2 was around 8 years old by
the time this version was released, but to think that this optimized console version
has been available for almost 15 years now makes me feel silly for not finding it sooner. [ Quake 2 Game Audio ] So while a classic game being included with
another doesn’t always guarantee a home run, it’s always interesting to see the adjustments
or concessions the developers had to make. While this is just a small sampling of games
within games that have been released over the years, there’s a ton of notable ones
we’d feel silly for not mentioning. So, maybe we need to return to this subject
in the future. [ Ending Theme ] This episode of My Life in Gaming is sponsored
by Audible. Signing up is completely effortless and uses
your Amazon account – we’ve got a custom URL to help you get started – go to audible
dot com slash M-L-I-G or text M-L-I-G to five hundred five hundred to start your 30-day
free trial, which gets you one audiobook and two Audible Originals of your choosing. Coury helped me swap the batteries in all
of my Phantasy Star cartridges back when he was working on the save file preservation
episode, but I was still kind of nervous about diving into Phantasy Star II because people
say that is one of the grindiest RPGs, and you know me, I’m being stubborn about playing
my real cartridge. Well, years ago I got through the original
Dragon Warrior on NES with the help of audiobooks to keep me engaged during its aimless grinding
but I hadn’t really done anything like that since. So I decided to see if Audible could help
me get going in Phantasy Star II. I thought it might be fun to check out the
old Star Wars expanded universe to fit the sci-fi theme – Heir to the Empire has honestly
been really entertaining and has helped so much in getting me through Phantasy Star II’s
early game grind. One of Audible’s best features is that you
retain access to all audiobooks in your collection even if you end your subscription. You get new credits for audiobooks and Audible
Originals every month, and unused credits roll over to the next month… and as long
as you’re a subscriber, you can even exchange audiobooks you didn’t like for another. You can also find our URL in the video description
– audible dot com slash MLiG or text MLiG to five hundred five hundred. And while you go do that, I’ll be getting
on with the good parts of Phantasy Star II.

Sega GAME GEAR Buying Guide & Fun Games

October 18, 2019 | Articles, Blog | 100 Comments

Sega GAME GEAR Buying Guide & Fun Games

Metal Jesus: Metal Jesus here and I’m back
again with Kinsey. Kinsey: Hello and today we are going to be
talking about a buying guide for the Sega Game Gear. Metal Jesus: And you are perfect for this
video because you had one as a kid, right? Kinsey: Yep. That was pretty much my go to
hand held as a kid because it was color screen and I’m like, “Yeah, this is awesome.” Metal Jesus: Well and we’re going to be doing
this video because we get a lot of requests for it. I think there’s a lot of mystery around
the Game Gear. So we’re going to talk bout the hardware, what you need to look out for,
as well as the variants, the accessories and we’re going to recommend some games you get
day one. Let’s take a look. Kinsey: So first, we’re going to talk about
the hardware and the Game Gear is actually pretty special for the time because it was
back lit and color. Metal Jesus: Which is really important compared
to the original Game Boy, which was what, black and white or? Kinsey: Green. Metal Jesus: Green and yellow. Yeah, so Sega
was attempting to do some thing kind of forward thinking and bring color to the handheld.
Now actually to be fair, the Atari Lynx did it first, but this was another answer to that
and for the most part, when this came out that was a huge selling point. Kinsey: Yeah, yeah. It was amazing. When I
first saw this at the store, I was like, “That’s the one I want.” Metal Jesus: Now some of the other things
I like about the Game Gear is that I think it’s really comfortable to hold. I like how
it’s wide, almost like a P-S-P, or something like that. It’s really comfortable even today. Kinsey: It’s really, really nice. Metal Jesus: Yeah. You know, on the original
Game Boy I’d have to go like this to platy stuff. So I definitely prefer that. Now as
far as collecting goes, one of the really great things about the Game Gear as well,
is that there are over 300 games made for it and if you get an adapter, you can also
play most Master System games with it because I thinks it’s similar technology, or similar… Kinsey: The Game Gear is basically a repackaged
Master System, so it’s basically the same tech, just in a cuter package. Metal Jesus: Yeah and a lot of people, especially
in North America, didn’t really get into collecting for the Master System. So this is an option
for people. Kinsey: Yeah. Metal Jesus: And most of the games are dirt
cheap. Kinsey: Yeah. Now I get really surprised when
I’m like, “Oh, that Game Gear game’s $25.” Metal Jesus: Right, right. Yeah to give you
an idea, the most expensive game, I think, is Panzer Dragoon Mini and that’s by far the
most expensive one. I think it’s like a hundred bucks. Kinsey: Yeah, it’s like a hundred bucks. Metal Jesus: Yeah, but these go down from
there and most of them are literally a dollar, five bucks, ten bucks, something like that. Kinsey: Yeah it’s basically the Panzer Dragoon
and Mortal Kombat 3 are the really expensive ones. Metal Jesus: Yeah there’s a couple of them,
but not many. So it’s very easy to collect for, which is what I like and actually that’s
what I do, is when I go out, if I see a Game Gear game, I don’t own, I’ll be like, “Sure,
why not.” Kinsey: $3, $1, yes. Metal Jesus: So that’s kind of some of the
positives. Now, there are some negatives and we talked about the screen and while Sega
was trying to do something really far advanced, the thing is that screen technology on a hand
held just sucked batteries. Kinsey: Yeah. Metal Jesus: And so, unfortunately, this will
cook through six AA batteries in no time. Kinsey: Yeah, when I was little, I tried to
take one on a road trip. There was a lot of gas station batteries I went through. Metal Jesus: That’s so funny. The other thing
about it is that unfortunately, some of the capacitors that were used in this fail a lot
and so it’s unusual to find a perfectly working Game Gear unfortunately. As a matter of fact,
my first Game Gear, the screen was funky, they had no sound. Kinsey: Got to wear headphones and lean it
weird and you’re like, “Alright, this I can now do.” Metal Jesus: Yeah. But one of the good things
is and some of you watching this may have noticed, that this is a little bit unusual,
this one right here. So this is modded and there’s a bunch of people out there who mod
these. As a matter of fact, a guy named Marco did this. He’s part of, I think, the AtariAge
Forum and actually what he did, is he replaced the screen on here with an LCD screen, super
bright, and it’s shockingly better. So we’ll actually compare them in a second here. He
also replaced a lot of the capacitors for the sound, which is really nice of him to
do that and it also has V-G-A out. Kinsey: That’s so awesome. Metal Jesus: Yes. So this is really cool.
So basically, if you use the brightness over here, you can either set it to be on the handheld
or you can send it out to your TV or your computer monitor. Kinsey: Oh, that’s awesome. Metal Jesus: It changes it completely. If
someone is going to start collecting Game Gear now, because the screen is kind of one
of the bummers, it’s really hard to go and buy one of these today and have to deal with
that screen. So getting a new screen on there is like it’s night and day. Kinsey: Yeah, it’s bringing new life to the
Game Gear, which is awesome because there’s great games for it. It get’s over looked a
lot. Metal Jesus: Yeah, definitely. Now there are
a lot of accessories, so let’s talk about that next. Alright, so we were talking about
the terrible battery life of the Game Gear, but there are other solutions, right? Kinsey: We can get you a one of a kind chick
magnet. You can wear this baby on your belt. Metal Jesus: When you first mentioned this
I was like, “What the hell are you talking about? Oh, right.” You seen a fanny pack. Kinsey: With my Game Gear fanny pack and my
Game Gear battery pack. I just need a Game Gear hat. Metal Jesus: I’m surprised you don’t have
one. Kinsey: I wish I did. Metal Jesus: But this is a rechargeable Game
Gear battery pack. It’s actually cool. Kinsey: Yeah and it really helps extend the
life of your battery and you’re not always going to get more AA’s. Metal Jesus: I know. Just to do this video
I sent Rebecca, my wife, to go to Target to buy a bunch of batteries just so we would
have them. It’s ridiculous, right? But so it’s nice that this is here and the other
thing too is that you can use a Genesis power adapter as well. Kinsey: Yeah, for the Genesis 2, I actually
did that a lot when I was little. I just sat by the wall and played my Game Gear. Metal Jesus: Yeah and so I think a lot of
people do that now, too. Even myself when I’m in my game here, I just use that. So it’s
not that big of a deal. So some other accessories are, of course, I forget what this is called. Kinsey: The Super Wide Gear. Metal Jesus: Super Wide Gear and it’s funky
too. It opens up like this, it hooks on the back. Honestly, I don’t fell like it needs
it that much, but it’s just one of those things that you had back then, right? Kinsey: I used it when I was little. I was
like, “This is awesome. Look at how big it is, yeah!” Metal Jesus: They should do this for other
stuff. Now that I’m thinking about it, I wonder if this hooked on the Vita or something, that’d
be hilarious. Kinsey: It’d be great. Metal Jesus: That’d be great. Another thing
is, we mentioned it earlier and that is you can play most Master System games on it because
the technology is very similar. All you need is a Master Gear converter. Kinsey: Yeah. Metal Jesus: Now what’s weird about this is
that this can be collectible or expensive, not super expensive, but this can cost you
more than the Game Gear itself, which is hilarious. Kinsey: Yeah. Metal Jesus: But, it’s pretty cool. You basically
pop the game in here, it attaches to the back, turn it on and you’re playing Master System
games. So it’s pretty awesome. Another accessory that a lot of people were kind of impressed
with was the TV tuner. Kinsey: Yeah, watch TV on your Game Gear. Metal Jesus: Color TV. But, of course, it’s
really useless today because it’s all broadcast in digital. Kinsey: Yeah and the rabbit ears won’t really
help you. Metal Jesus: Yeah won’t really help you, but
that’s pretty much for accessories, right? There’s a lot of bags and things like that. Kinsey: Yeah, there’s a link cable. Metal Jesus: Oh, right. Kinsey: Want to play a Game Gear with your
friends? Metal Jesus: That’s right, yeah. So that’s
the accessories, but now we probably want to talk about some of the variants of the
hardware, right? Because this is where it can be pretty exciting collecting for the
Game Gear. The Game Gear itself, the black one, is not very expensive. It’s like what,
15, 20 bucks? Kinsey: Yeah, but this is the one a lot of
people know of. So I don’t even know if a lot of people know it comes in other colors. Metal Jesus: Yeah, that’s true. So I showed
off in a pick ups video a little while ago, the yellow one. I know. A lot of people thought
this was fake or some sort of shell, but it actually was released in Japan. That’s where
this comes from. Kinsey: They get all the good colors. Metal Jesus: I know. But yeah I absolutely
love it. I think it’s beautiful. So there’s yellow, also blue. Kinsey: The blue one is probably one of the
more common colors. So little bit rarer than the black, but not much. Metal Jesus: It’s a nice color of blue though. Kinsey: Still awesome. Metal Jesus: Yeah and then you have, I think
one of the rarer ones, right? Kinsey: Yeah. Metal Jesus: It’s certainly collectible. Kinsey: There was also some special edition
ones released, as there is for most systems, but in Japan, for example, this one’s a Magic
Night Rayearth system, which if you’re an anime kid like I am, love it. Rayearth is
awesome. Metal Jesus: And now, did it come with a game? Kinsey: Mm hmm, and it came with a Rayearth
game as well. Metal Jesus: Same exact color as the system,
which is perfect. Kinsey: And it’s beautiful, it’s all matchy,
matchy and if you like Rayearth especially getting the game and the system together it’s…I
don’t know, it was magical when I saw it. Metal Jesus: And you have it in the box. I
was like, “Wow!” Kinsey: Yeah and the game’s really fun too,
especially if you like Rayearth, because it’s just an action game and it’s really fun. Metal Jesus: There’s also some other variants
too. There’s a Coca Cola one, which has another color red, which is really cool looking too.
There’s a few others that people are looking out for so it’s awesome. Kinsey: So now we’re going to talk about some
games. These aren’t necessarily the rarest or the craziest, but these are the ones that
we think are really good to own or we just really enjoy. Metal Jesus: Absolutely. Kinsey: So on that note, I’m going to start
with The Lion King because it’s on everything, but this is me riding in the nostalgia train
for a little bit. The Lion King and also Bonker’s House of Wax, it’s awesome you guys. Don’t
judge me, but these basically were the games I played as a child and it doesn’t do it justice
when I play this on any other system. So this is always recommended by me and it’s not that
expensive. So I think it’s worth it and it really shows off the Game Gear’s capabilities. Metal Jesus: That’s cool. So a game I’m going
to recommend here is a game I was surprised that I really enjoyed. I don’t know if it’s
on any other system, I don’t care, but it’s called Devilish and I thought this would be
some sort of arcade action game. No, it’s actually like an Arkenoid clone, but it’s
got it’s own thing basically where you have the paddles and you’re knocking a ball back
and forth. The screen is heading down, but what’s really cool about this is that you
can reconfigure the paddle. So for instance, you have one paddle or two up above each other,
but then you can split them out. You can put one on it’s side. Plus you can control the
up and down so you can throw the upper paddle higher. I don’t know, it’s just like… Kinsey: It sounds complicated, but at the
same time I’m enthralled. It sounds awesome. Metal Jesus: See, the thing I like is that
Breakout and Arkenoid had been around for so long, that that’s kind of a tired game,
right? But I like games that try to do something new with it because I grew up with that. I
loved those games when they first came out. So Devilish on the Game Gear, pretty cool. Kinsey: It’s got a good name, too. Metal Jesus: It is. Kinsey: And actually on that same vein, Haley
Wars. It’s a vertical shooter. It’s super fun. But what it does a little bit differently
is that whenever you miss one of the ships or one of the asteroids or comets that’s coming
at you, if you miss it, it goes and it hits Earth and you have a gauge on the bottom that
says what percentage Earth is destroyed and if it gets to 100, that’s it. Metal Jesus: Yeah, it’s a surprisingly really
fun shooter. I was like, “I played this a lot.” Now, you’re holding two versions of
it here and I did this because I wanted to remind myself that one of the nice things
about the Game Gear is that it is region free. So often if you can’t find a copy of the North
American version, get the Japanese version. That’s exactly what I did here. You can play
either one, it’s pretty cool. So okay that was cool. Next up for me was a game, I was
a little surprised and that is Vampire Master of Darkness. Kinsey: Yes. Metal Jesus: It looks cheesy as hell. Kinsey: The story’s a little cheesy, but it’s
worth it. Metal Jesus: It’s cool. It’s basically a Castlevania
clone. They’re not even sugar coating it, it’s Castlevania, right? But I like it. For
one, I find it to be a little bit easier than Castlevania for some reason. To me that’s
a good thing because on a little screen it can be difficult. As a matter of fact, this
game on the original Game Gear screen I think is pretty difficult because it’s hard to see
bats and stuff. On my modded one it changes the game, it’s so much more playable. So,
yeah, highly recommended, this is a fun game. Kinsey: Nice. And then one I really wanted
to mention is Revenge of Drancon. What I really like about this game is that it’s super unassuming.
Most people probably walk by this because… Metal Jesus: It looks like a budget title. Kinsey: It looks like a budget, I don’t know,
generic, but, it’s Wonderboy. It’s so fun. It’s basically the arcade version of Wonderboy
and it’s wonderful. Metal Jesus: That’s weird that they changed
the name to something like that, though. Kinsey: I don’t even know how to say it, come
on. It looks super generic, but this is full of wonderful secrets. So if you see this,
you can get it. Metal Jesus: Awesome. Alright so next up for
me is a game called Dragon Crystal, speaking of games that look fairly generic. Now this
game, when I popped it in I was like, “This looks so familiar.” But that’s because it
also came out as Fatal Labyrinth, or at least very similar in style. So this is a maze like
dungeon crawler, top down. This is another game where I popped it in and I played it
for way longer than I expected to because it’s so easy, it’s so much fun. Essentially
you’re just cruising around in this maze, you’re slowly exposing parts of the dungeon
and combat’s fun. You basically just push up against the enemy, you don’t have to battle,
you don’t have to button mash, there’s really not much skill, which is perfect for a handheld
where you’re just trying to have some fun. But there’s armor upgrades and all that sort
of stuff so I enjoyed it quite a bit and this game is dirt cheap. Kinsey: Yeah. Alright and next I’m going to
talk about Legend of Illusion, Mickey Mouse. Metal Jesus: Nice. Kinsey: And this one’s awesome because this
is in the same series of Castles of Illusion, which everybody knows, but this one, I believe
it’s a sequel. It’s in the same series, but it’s…I think the story is a little bit more
interesting and it’s just not one that anyone played. Everybody knows Castle of Illusion,
but this one’s definitely worth it. Metal Jesus: Cool. So next up is a game that
I had never heard of until I got a Game Gear and that is Ax Battler: A Legend of Golden
Axe. So this is a total surprise. It’s basically…it reminds me of Zelda 2, where there’s an overhead
map and then it goes to a 2D exploration. I don’t know, I guess it’s a side thing for
Golden Axe. So I don’t know. It’s pretty cool, I enjoyed it quite a bit and it plays great. Kinsey: Great. Alright and we wanted to mention
a Sonic game. Metal Jesus: Yes. Kinsey: Because how can you talk about a Sega
system without talking about Sonic? Metal Jesus: And you and I were talking like,
“Well which one?” Because you almost picked Sonic Drift. Kinsey: I really like Sonic Drift and Sonic
Drift 2 is the only one that came out in the U.S., but it’s really good and I know everybody
hates it and I’m sorry. Metal Jesus: I just put you on the spot right
there. Like, “Dammit!” Kinsey: I know people don’t like it, but you
can play it on the Sonic Gems on the GameCube. So it’s awesome. Anyways, this is not Sonic
Drift. This is Sonic Triple Trouble and it’s in the same series as Sonic Chaos, it’s the
sequel. A lot of people also didn’t like this one because they thought it was too easy,
but part of me, if I’m sitting on the couch playing Sonic the Hedgehog on a handheld,
easy is fine with me because I really like flying through the levels. That’s when you
can go fast and not have to worry about it as much. Metal Jesus: Yeah I agree. Easy difficulty
is not an automatic turn off for me. I’m like, “No, no, no, that’s kind of cool.” Because
there’s plenty of other ones that are hard. So you can always play those ones too. Kinsey: Yeah. Exactly. Metal Jesus: Alright and then finally, one
of the more collectible and it’s really not even that expensive, but it’s Shining Force,
I’m going to have to say this here, The Sword of Hajhy, H-A-J-H-Y. Kinsey: Hajhy. Metal Jesus: Why? I don’t know, but this is
a fantastic game on the Game Gear. It’s actually one of the more highly rated ones too. Shining
Force games are really cool. They’re very similar to Fire Emblem, where they’re turn
based strategy games. Now I don’t believe this one has permadeath though. There’s a
lot to it. I enjoyed it quite a bit. Again, it’s a little bit more collectible so if you
find a copy, definitely check it out. Kinsey: So that’s our buying guide for the
Sega Game Gear and it’s a pretty rad system. Metal Jesus: I know, I love collecting for
it. I love going to expos and retro gaming stores and everyone else is ignoring it. They’re
looking at Nintendo and I just weasel right passed them, look for games I don’t own. It’s
like awesome. Kinsey: It’s great. Metal Jesus: Now the thing is, is that Hyperkin
has announced that they may add Game Gear support to the Retron 5. Kinsey: Yeah. Metal Jesus: I know, so cool. The Retron 5
is a clone system that supports a lot of different things and Game Gear was left out for some
reason. Kinsey: I know. It’s why I didn’t buy one.
I heard it was going to have all these different systems and I was like, “Game Gear, Game Gear,
Game Gear.” Metal Jesus: It supports Game Boy and Game
Boy Advance. It’s perfect just for Game Gear. I know. I actually reached out to them to
see if they could give me some more information. They didn’t, but I will update this video
in the description and also in the annotations as news comes available. So I’m crossing my
fingers for that. Kinsey: Me too. Metal Jesus: I know. Well hey, thanks for
coming on the channel. Kinsey: Of course. Metal Jesus: Now where can people find you
on the interwebs? Kinsey: I am on Twitter @KinsZilla, K-I-N-S-Z-I-L-L-A. Metal Jesus: And you have a YouTube channel? Kinsey: I have a YouTube channel, three videos
and two that matter. Metal Jesus: Two that matter and the third
one is? Kinsey: Just gameplay from the Witcher when
I had a weird mountain bug, there were mountains in the city. Metal Jesus: Oh really? Kinsey: Yeah, it was too funny not to share. Metal Jesus: Well and you’ve done an unboxing
video. I remember that. That’s awesome. Alright, you can find me @MetalJesusRocks, Twitter,
YouTube, Facebook, all that sort of stuff. Alright guys, thanks very much for watching,
thanks for subscribing and take care. Alright, now that I have the Sega Game Gear
buying guide under my belt, I’m curious, what other buying guides would you like to see
me do? I have some ideas. There’s some good stuff out there. You know what needs to be
done, a P-S-P buying guide needs to be done. That’s a pretty good one because there’s like
three different models, tons of good games.

FLASHOUT 2 – MAKING OF VIDEO – Futuristic anti-gravity racing game by Jujubee!

FLASHOUT 2 is very much different from its precedessor. Tracks are more curvy and offer a lot of variety, with many sharp corners, twists, bends, loops, racing upside-down, blood freezing speed jumps and so on, so in general the game is not only faster but also extremely exciting. FLASHOUT 2 is a much bigger game. There are more circuits, licensed music tunes, more leagues, there’s also an animated story, 11 different languages are supported and of course the highly-anticipated multiplayer mode is also there. Moreover we’ve made many changes to the Career Mode which is now much more exciting thanks to new racing modes, such as Elimination or for example the Destruction Mode, which is a bit similar to a deathmatch because your goal is to destroy as many enemies as possible, so there’s a lot more going on. We’re very happy that Apple made the decision to support game controllers and thanks to our cooperation with Moga FLASHOUT 2 features full controllers support on both iOS and Android devices, and I must say the feeling and the overall experience is simply amazing, the game is very responsive and makes you feel like you’re playing on a portable console. In such games as FLASHOUT 2 you want to get the best and flawless experience, so we put a lot of effort to get as much as 60fps on high-end devices such as the iPhone 5s and iPad Air. As result the gamplay is amazingly smooth and thanks to geometry streaming and heavy code optimization FLASHOUT 2 is still able to offer console-quality graphics and spectacular visual effects, even on older devices! In reviews and comments players asked us for an online multiplayer mode and we are happy to confirm that the game will launch with this exciting new feature. You will be able to challenge your friends or compete against random players from all around the world and we are sure that you will love the online experience in FLASHOUT 2! There’s no doubt that FLASHOUT 3D was a success for Jujubee, and we knew from the very beginning that we want to go further with this franchise and that the second game will be even better. In the case of FLASHOUT 2 we had more time to polish every little detail and we could take profit of all the great feedback we got from players and fans. As result, FLASHOUT 2 is a completely different game, made 100% from scratch and it offers you a console-like gaming experience like never before. FLASHOUT 2 – Coming Q1 2014 Android, Windows Phone, PC and Mac versions will be out at a later date.

Every Game Matters | 2019 World Championship Group Stage Day 4 Tease

I originally thought that our results for Group Stage would be that we wouldn’t drop a single game, and go undefeated. We’ve already lost a match so I hope in the next matches,
we will give it our all and play well in every game and go 5-1. Right now, we are really hungry for that first win. Once we pick up a win, it’ll be the beginning of our hope.

Nintendo World Championships (NES) – Angry Video Game Nerd (AVGN)

He’s gonna take you back to the past To play the shitty games that suck ass He’d rather have a buffalo Take a diarrhea dump in his ear He’d rather eat the rotten asshole Of a roadkill skunk and down it with beer He’s the angriest gamer you’ve ever heard He’s the Angry Nintendo Nerd He’s the Angry Atari Sega Nerd He’s the Angry Video Game Nerd If this box contains what I think it does, then this will be the greatest moment in my career as a game collector. I bought this from an eBay auction. The seller gave a list of games included, mostly NES games that I own already, but there’s one that caught my attention: Nintendo World Championships. Under normal circumstances, this particular game would cost a fortune. The seller probably had no idea what they had, and that happens sometimes. Somebody’s trying to get rid of some old games at a flea market or a yard sale or something, and they don’t realize that what they’re selling happens to be one of the most rare NES games in existence. Nintendo World Championships was never sold in stores. It was a specially-made game cartridge used as part of a gaming competition. Remember the 1989 movie The Wizard with the big game tournament? Well, this was a real-life version inspired by the movie. The competition was part of a big festival called PowerFest in 1990. It was divided into age groups. Each winner got a cash prize of ten thousand bucks, and took home other goodies. The finalists each got to keep their own copy of the game. But there was another version made in gold. The gold cartridges are even more rare. Only twenty-six were made, and given out as part of a random prize giveaway in Nintendo Power magazine. Also, the red label only existed in the promo pics. The actual games were all gold with a cheap logo glued on that’s been cut out with scissors. The whereabouts of these games remain largely unknown, but, in recent years, many of them have shown up in auctions commanding huge prices, but there’s still more out there. There were other Nintendo contests, like Campus Challenge–two of them– and the Super Nintendo PowerFest ’94 competition. But Nintendo World Championships seems to be the most famous, and is considered the holy grail amongst NES collectors. Could I have one of these in my possession right now? Let’s find out! Oh boy, I can’t wait! It’s–I wonder–it’s probably the gray one! But who knows? It might even be the gold one! This is a reproduction cart. Anybody can get these. Worth about fifty bucks. Well, at least I can still say I own Nintendo World Championships. It’s not the real thing. I’ll never own a complete NES collection. Wait a minute. I know somebody who might own a real NWC. Yeah! Somebody who’s as obsessed with game collecting as I am. When it comes to NES, he’s even more crazy. (Balloon Fight theme playing) (phone ringing) Hello? Hey Pat, you NES Punk, this is the Nerd. N…N…Nerd? I don’t think I know any Nerd… The Fucking Nerd. Oh! Oh, that Nerd. Well, why didn’t you say so? [Nerd]
So, I was just wondering, uh, how’s your game collection been going? I have Flintstones: Surprise at Dinosaur Peak! Nice. Hm. Magical Chase for the TurboGrafx-16! Come on! You got better stuff than that! What about the Power Glove in the collector’s case? [Nerd]
What else? [Pat]
I know, you want something special. [Nerd] Yeah.
[Pat] Something spectacular. [Pat]
How about the… Super Mario Brothers Swimmies? [Nerd]
Hm. Yeah, well, that’s neat if you’re six years old. I’m talking, like, NES. My beloved M82 demo unit. No, that thing’s a piece of crap! What?! [Nerd]
All right, well, tell you what, what’s the most rare NES game you have? [Pat]
Ha ha ha. Well, if you must know, I do happen to own a little game called the Nintendo World Championships cart? Uh… y-y-you mean a reproduction, right? Oh, it’s real. Wow, are you sure? It could be a fake. You never know. Pretty sure it’s real. Tell you what. Uh, if you come on over, I’ll help, uh, authenticate it for you. [Nerd]
I’ll give it the Nerd seal of approval. The Nerd seal of approval? What is that, like, you’ll take a dump on it? No, that would be the Nerd seal of disapproval. Come over, I’ll take a look at it. Oh. [Pat] Hey, Nerd. How are you?
[Nerd] Hey! How you doing? [Pat] Here in the basement.
[Nerd] Yep. [Pat] Well, you know why you asked me here, yes…
[Nerd] Oh, of course. Oh my God, Amiga in the box?! Great computer system, but, you know, you shouldn’t put it on top of the boxed Odyssey because it’s going to damage the box and get creases there and stuff. [Pat] Again, I know why you asked me here.
[Nerd] Yeah, yeah. APF TV Fun? Cute, fun little Pong set. You know, you get this stuff, it’s amazing, all this stuff you find, you know? [Nerd] All right, let’s see the NWC.
[Pat] The what? [Pat] Oh, the World Championships cart.
[Nerd] Yeah. [Pat]
O-OK, just… yeah. [Pat]
Be-be careful! Um… ah, this isn’t the real thing. Nah. What do you mean…? It’s fake, sorry to say. Oh, no, yeah, you’re right, it’s not–it’s not real at all. I just spent thousands of dollars on a fake game! Ah… I-I could, I could take it off your hands, um… I know you need to make room for all those games you have in your collection and everything, you know– I appreciate it, but I’ll just take that fake game back. Uh, well, ah, I could trade you another game, like, how about, ah… Combat on Atari? [Pat]
Oh, wow, Combat. Classic game. It was included with every Atari 2600. I love that game, but, you know what, I’m going to go ahead, I’ll just–I’ll just–just give me back that one right there. C’mon, Combat! Yeah. Combat! Com…bat. With the tanks! (makes gunfire and explosion noises) Uh-huh. Tanks? [Nerd] Planes, too. (makes plane noises)
[Pat] Yeah. Yeah, it’s– Like I said, it’s OK, but you know what, I’m-I’m totally fine, I probably have a couple Combat carts, I’ll just take that one back. Tell you what. You see that box of games over there? You can take the whole thing, just for this one fake game. You know what? I’ll-I’ll take a look. I’ll take a look. Wow, look at the games! Oh, Golf. Plain old regular black box Golf. Oh, wow, this is worth a lot of money. Oh, not one, but TWO copies of Home Alone! Oh, jeez. Super Mario Duck Hunt? I only have fourteen other copies! And what’s this? More games underneath? Well, let’s see what else we have in this treasure trove of games! Oh, yeah. Great, we got Spot here. Oh, Hook! Arr! And, oh, at least there’s a decent one, we got Legend of Zelda. W-what was that game you just had? Oh, tha–that was just Legend of Zelda! Legend of my ass! No, no, don’t-don’t-don’t touch it! I wasn’t gonna touch it, I was just pointing at it. [Pat] Don’t point even!
[Nerd] Don’t point? It can’t be played. Never. [Nerd] Can I look at it?
[Pat] No. Don’t look at it. Hm. [Nerd]
Oh my fucking God. OK, relax. Rel-relax! It-it’s just a video game. It’s only a Nintendo World Championships gold cart. It’s just the most sought-after video game on the planet! (both laughing hysterically) It’s right there! And it’s–it’s mine! It’s all mine! What–no-no-no-no-no, that was my box! You traded me for it; I accepted. No you didn’t. You were just making fun of those games. No, no, I really wanted all those fine games! I needed another copy of Super Mario Duck Hunt! I’m making a coffee table out of them! Oh, oh, really? Oh, w-w-well, you can take them all then. Yeah, yeah, but you’re not getting that NWC gold cart! I didn’t even know it was in there. Uh, maybe you should get the prescription renewed on your glasses? The gray is better. I mean, look at it! It’s individually numbered, and these were the game carts actually used in the competition. The gold… well, these are just… giveaways. Here, take it. Yeah, you know what? You are right. The gray one is better. You know, I feel really bad taking it away from you. So, here, give me back the gold one and I’ll give you back your gray one. I appreciate the gesture, but that’s OK. You go ahead, you keep that gray one. I’ll stick with the cheap gold giveaway. Yeah, but the gold one’s a piece of crap! I mean, you don’t want that! I mean, you know how they made those. They just cut out the logo with cheap paper, and they glued it on. With glue! Yeah! Elmer’s Glue! Yeah, yeah. I bet Mister Elmer himself glued it on. From his own goat. (makes goat bleating sound) Yeah, OK, well, um… I guess I’ll be going now. OK, fine. And the award for best NES collection in the world goes to… Pat the NES Punk. (applause, cheering) I did it! I can’t believe I did it! Both World Championships carts! Oh man! Oh, what an award! What an honor! Thank–yeah! Oh, yeah! (crickets) Now, I officially know now that I have the best NES collection in the known universe, but I couldn’t have done it without all of you! Wait, who am I kidding? I did this all myself, and you’re all jealous! (laughing) (crickets) All right, Nerd. We’re gonna settle this like men! OK, Pat. We’re gonna play some Nintendo World Championships! Yeah! Winner takes all! OK. Wh-where’s-where’s your Nintendo? Oh, the Nintendo? Right there, the Nintoaster. The what? Are you playing video games or making breakfast? I’m not turning these expensive games into a goddamn English muffin! Well, yeah–I mean, with all seriousness, we shouldn’t be messing with these, really. I mean, like you said, they can never be played, let alone looked at! So let’s play the reproduction cart. Great idea! [Nerd]
All right, hey–wait, the start’s not working, what’s going on here? Well, second player starts it! Are you ready? Ooh, starting gun! [Nerd]
Super Mario Brothers? [Pat]
Yeah, you gotta get 50 coins as quickly as you can! You better go! [Nerd]
Well, that’s lame. I thought this was supposed to be this super-rare, elusive game. Not Super Mario Brothers, which you could get for like, two bucks, with Duck Hunt included. [Nerd]
OK, so I got the 50 coins, that’s it? That’s it. Now, it’s on to Rad Racer! [Nerd]
Oh, now we’re playing Rad Racer? [Pat]
Yeah–oh, but just the first, the first race. [Nerd]
You gotta be kidding me. [Pat]
It’s a competition, Nerd! [Nerd]
Just to think that the NWC cartridges are so expensive, you could actually use that money and buy a real car! Sure, you can buy a car, but it wouldn’t be a racer as rad as this! [Nerd]
All right, so I finished Rad Racer. Now I’m up to Tetris? [Pat]
Final game, Nerd. All right, you’re on a time limit, and to maximize your score, you gotta get the four-line Tetrises. Wait, wait, why am I helping you? [Pat]
You think you deserve these games? You changed your name from the Angry Nintendo Nerd, to the Video Game Nerd! I’m the NES Punk, I deserve these games! I know a lot of people who own Tetris. [Nerd]
And they actually have the whole game! [Pat]
That’s it! OK, that’s your score. I’m going to annihilate it. Thank you very much! [Pat]
OK, I just beat you on Super Mario Brothers, now it’s Rad Racer time.
[Nerd] Look at that. Well, you got two more games! Yeah, I know I do! I can count! [Nerd]
Well, just think. We’re playing on a reproduction cart, but if we were playing one of those other ones, it would be the same thing. So what’s the point? Just to play on an overly-priced game cartridge? What’s the point? The point is those games are a part of Nintendo and video game history. They’re a part of our culture! Those games represent the point where Nintendo dominated our–our society! [Pat]
Oh–ah! [Pat]
Tetris is next. I’m not letting you talk me out of this one. I’m gonna win! [Nerd]
No, I’m serious! This game is a piece of shit! [Pat]
C’mon, Pat! C’mon! Yeah! Triple line score! Double line score! I’m gonna win! The games are mine! Nintendo World Championships is poop on a pedestal! It’s an over-glorified holy shit grail! Fuck it to hell! Fuck it to high heaven, purgatory, and all existence! [Pat]
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yes! Yes! I won! I won! (grunting) Here you go. You can have this one. (laughing) (both laughing)
[Nerd] Oh, man. (both yelling)

Is ‘Fortnite’ gone? The popular game disappeared into a black hole


Action 52 (NES) – Angry Video Game Nerd (AVGN)

It’s a Nintoaster. And yes, it works. He’s gonna take you back to the past To play the shitty games that suck ass He’d rather have a buffalo Take a diarrhea dump in his ear He’d rather eat the rotten asshole Of a roadkill skunk and down it with beer He’s the angriest gamer you’ve ever heard He’s the Angry Nintendo Nerd He’s the Angry Atari Sega Nerd He’s the Angry Video Game Nerd Are you ready for some action? Some Action 52? I suppose so, because I get requests for this game all the time, like this one right here. “Action 52. Fuck this game, please do a review of it. You asshole. Thanks.” Wow. I guess I gotta do it now. Let’s start with the cartridge. It’s the freak misfit of the NES library. Games came in gray, black, blue, silver, gold, but clear? You can tell just by looking at it, this is a game that’s so bad, it has nothing to hide. Another thing, if you play it for more than an hour, not that you’d want to, it gets really hot and smells like burning plastic. It’s not because of the toaster. The same thing happens if you play it in the top-loader. Not only is this game crap, but it’s crap that comes with a price: $199. That’s a lot of money, but there’s 52 games, so let me calculate this. $199 divided by 52 equals… uh… well, you gotta pay tax, too, so let’s just say $4 a game. Wow. What a deal! 52 action-packed games bundled into one cartridge? All for an efficient price? It was every kid’s dream. More games! More games! Yeah! Lights… …camera… …Action 52! Awww! Where’d they get the music? [hip-hop] Okay, um, the significance? “It Takes Two”, Action 52? [GAME] Make your selection now. [AVGN] Well, let’s get this thing started. We’re gonna have ourselves a little marathon here and determine if the $199 was worth it. Game #1, “Firebreather”. Okay, well, it’s pretty self-explanatory. And would you know this is the only game on the entire cartridge that’s two players only? Gee, which game should we start with? Well, how ’bout the only game you can’t play alone? Well, that’s $4 wasted already. #2, “Starevil”. Who’s gonna dodge that?! Nobody! Not the first time! You’d have to know, “Oh, this is gonna be a vertical 2D shooter,” “and there’s gonna be an obstacle immediately at the start of the game.” That’s one way to get you on your toes. Other than that, it’s real easy. As long as you keep firing, none of the enemies come anywhere near you. I guess that makes sense. If I was an intergalactic vacuum cleaner getting shot at, I’d be like “Oh, fucking hell!” “There’s a menorah shooting Q-Tips, get outta the way!” Not even the first level boss wants to be involved. Sometimes, it doesn’t show up at all, and you’re stuck in a dead-end. What happened? Did the game give up? Ugh, that’s another $4. Next. #3, “Illuminator”. You’re not even allowed to see in this game? Real fun idea. For a room that has about a thousand lightbulbs, it sure goes dark a lot. And they’re just decoration. Thought you could light a room with a light? No, you gotta kill vampires. But after you’ve killed one, you only get one second before the room goes dark again. Who wants to play a game that’s pitch black? It’s so black I can see my reflection in the screen. The question is, how much more black could this be? And the answer is none. And no, you can’t go any higher. This is it. Great fucking game. #4, “G-Force Fgt.” …what? Or, just “G-Force”. It’s another 2D shooter. You know what? This would be okay for Atari 2600. The only two controls are move and shoot. This game was made in 1991, the same year Super NES came out. Not to mention, if you want to play a good 2D side-scroller game on the NES, try fuckin’ Lifeforce. And what is this anyway? An inside-out dolphin shooting at roadkill toads? I don’t know, I’m just using my imagination. That’s all you have when you play this miserable pile of goat shit. #5, “Ooze”. [sarcasm] Oh, wow! A title screen? Really? [normal] Oh my god, it’s… it’s… Shitpickle shitpickle shitpickle… Whoa-hoa! …shitpickle shitpickle shitpickle… Whoa! …shitpickle… Pickle! Sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-shit. Ahahahah. Shitpickle. Alrighty then, okay. Well, this is the first game that uses the B button. For jumping! Any gamer who grew up with Super Mario Bros. expects A to jump. But that’s the least of our worries. To jump over a hole, you have to tap the B button, and then press over. If you’re holding the B button, like you normally would, it locks you vertically, until you let go. It’s an anomaly of game programming. You know what’s really weird? Whenever you restart the menu, it always starts at Ooze. Is that the programmers’ personal recommendation? Well, so far, every one of these games is a bomb! But out of 52, I’m sure that eventually we’ll find one that’s decent. I hope! #6, “Silver Sword”. Well, green, green, and more green. What is this? A cabbage patch on a golf course? Infested with killer scrotums? This is a disgrace to the NES, the same platform that brought us games like Legend of Zelda. Silver Sword. The sword isn’t even silver! Maybe it’s corroded. #7, “Critical BP.” Or “Crytical Bypass”. Oh, now it’s spelled with a Y? Ugh, that’s dreadful. It’s like an optical illusion. Well, that’s pretty bad, when the game causes eyestrain and you can’t even fucking look at it. What is this, anyway? A pogo ball on a Segway shooting at birthday presents? Ugh, Crytical Bypass! It’s critical that you bypass this game! #8, “Jupiter Scope”. Nice. Another space shooter. This time, you’re a dead whale shooting at flaming condoms. That’s what it looks like! The screen never moves. It’s like Space Invaders, except without many invaders. Half the time, you’re just sitting around waiting! Come on, give me something to shoot at! Losing at this game is impossible. Just hold down the fire button and move back and forth. Okay, what’s next? #9, “Alfredo”. Or, “Alfred n’ the Fettuc”. Yeah, fettuc! You never heard of fettuc? What happened? Where’s the fucking game? [crickets] Well, there’s no game here. What happened? Did the programmers pass out, or did they just figure nobody would check all 52 games? Well, that’s $4 wasted. But I guess I can’t say I’m really too excited over playing a game called Alfredo, also known as “Alfred n’ the Fettuc”. #10, “Operation Full Moon”. Now that’s puke green if I ever saw it. The nauseating hue combined with a texture of vomit makes me think that this game ate Silver Sword and barfed it out. #11, “Dam Busters”. Those damn busters. Well, it should’ve been called “Alien Beaver Tomato Fight”. That’s all it is! You’re a beaver shooting tomatoes and navigating through a maze. Oops, dead end. What the shit? You can’t go back?! I’m trapped?! You’re shitting me! This game is shitting me. #12, “Thrusters”. Another space shooter. Well, it’s the same game as before, just different graphics. Where do they come up with these objects? I’m running out of imagination here. I can’t decipher anything- especially when the game starts having a fucking seizure! #13, “Haunted Hill”. Wow, a human being. I can’t believe it actually looks like something. Man, her boobs are bigger than her head. It’s a shitty side-scroller with the same bad controls as Ooze. Sadly, it’s the best game so far. Out of the way, you fucking ghosts, here comes Mrs. Tits, jumping like she’s on the moon! Die, you onion face balloon floating, uh… thing! I died? By touching the air?! #14, “Chill Out”. I wish I could chill out! This is horrendous! This one’s basically an Eskimo snowball massacre. Climb down shits and ladders and throw snowballs. What this? I died in mid-air?! That seems to be a theme we’re running into here. This game… doesn’t even care it sucks. Gee, how much money did we waste so far? Like, $56, I think? That’s already exceeded the average price of a Nintendo game. #15, “Sharks”. Yeah. Sharks. Sometimes sharks. Most of the time not. Well, you’re stuck on this one screen, but you sure have full rein. You can swim through the ocean floor. And that’s all it is. Just hope for sharks to come and… shoot ’em. #16, “Megalonia”. Another space shooter?! Flying through McDonald’s arches? No thanks! #17, “French Baker”. Oh, man! You’re a chef and the kitchen is really getting out of hand. Everything’s trying to kill you, hoagies, envelopes, and doughnuts. And what do you do? Hit ’em with your rolling pin, and don’t drop down. You’ll disintegrate. That’s always nice. #18, “Atmos Quake”. Ugh, another space shooter?! I pass. [sigh] I’m only up to #19? Geez… fuck! #19, “Meong”. What… the… fuck?! Okay, get this. You move from square to square, hoping that the next square won’t make you explode. So, it’s like a memory game that can only be done with trial and error. Good lord. #20, “Space Dreams”. Oh, my! What’s this gonna be? Why, of course! Another space shooter! This time, you’re a pacifier shooting at weird dolls, rabbits, and safety pins. Safety pins as enemies in a video game… Where do they come up with this stuff? Gee, what kind of enemy could I have for this game? I have 32 games left I have to program, so I have to hurry up. Ah, safety pin! That’ll be perfect! [typing] Next game. #21, “Streemerz”. You’re a clown climbing up platforms like Spider-Man. Ooh, a rabbit in a hat. What does that do? Nothing at all. A bag of money? How about that? It turns into a green frowning face? Is that supposed to teach you a lesson that taking money is greedy? No, I think I’m reading way too deep into it. Oh, then the game crashes. Good. #22, “Spread Fire”. What is this? They should’ve called this “Shooter Games 52”! This time, you’re a lobster. You don’t go anywhere, and half the time, there’s nothing to shoot at. These kind of games must have been the easiest to design. Make a black background, cover it in dots, and call it space. You know what? It’s getting old. #23, “Bublgum Rosy”. Or, “Bubble Gum Rossie.” [sarcasm] Yay! I’ve always wanted to play a game where I’m a little girl shooting bubbles! [normal] Wait a minute, you can’t even kill people? Well, what do you expect? They’re bubbles. You can jump on the enemies. Or wait… can you? And falling in spikes… doesn’t hurt you. This game… has no rules. #24, “Micro Mike”. Wow! Look out, Micro Mike! You’re going too fast! Even if you have the quickest reflexes, you’ll never be able to avoid the walls or other random objects that stand in your way. If only Micro Mike would slow the fuck down! #25, “Underground”. Well, at least it looks like underground. Wait a minute, this guy can fall down 50 feet and survive, but if he touches the mushrooms, he spins around like a bowling pin and dies? And what am I supposed to do here? What do I do? Wow, 25 shitty games… and still going. This is an endurance, man. I’ve never played such a huge compilation of crap in my life. Was the whole idea to make so many shitty games that there’d be no more shitty games left to make? Out of all these, there’s got to be at least one that’s… tolerable. #26, “Rocket Jock”. Or, “Rocket Jockey”. [sigh] You’re a cowboy on a rocket with a lasso. If you actually used the lasso, that would be kinda cool. But I guess they figured they didn’t have enough games that shoot. Yeah, kill those cows. Turn them into, uh… a bowl of cereal with a puppy dog. #27, “Non Human”. Well, isn’t that an appropriate title? Everything about these games are non-human. Except for that very human-like face. Or are they aliens? What are these for? Other than the faces just being the area where you die, which takes up half the screen. Ugh, you know you’re playing a great game when you can’t even jump over a hole. Augh, you can try all day, but you’ll always fall down into the purple dimension of green faces. #28, “Cry Baby”. By now, you’d be crying, so it’s like the game is mocking you. Okay, what’s wrong with this picture? Baby, adult? Baby, adult? And what about him, huh? What the hell is going on here? Why does the floor look like ice cube trays? What are you attacking with? Why do you die when you fall off the furniture? Why? What? Why? #29, “Slashers”. Uh, Slashers? I thought it would be like a horror game. Instead, it’s a poor man’s version of Double Dragon. Saying that is being extremely generous. It makes Bad Dudes look like a masterpiece. At least the backgrounds change. What are these? Beer steins? You’re not even allowed to walk past anybody. When an enemy appears, you stop dead in your tracks and can’t move until you have a punching match to the death. There’s zero strategy, you just mash buttons. And what are these, hookers? I guess this guy doesn’t understand the concept of a hooker. You’re supposed to fuck her, not fuck her up. Ungh, ungh, ungh! Die, boob lady! Ugh! #30, “Crazy Shuffle”. Could the characters be any smaller? You’re a tiny, indescribable object shooting tiny dots at other tiny objects. Sounds like fun? Well, guess what, it isn’t. #31, “Fuzz Power”. Well, fuzz is right. You’re some guy with a big nose, big feet, and lots of fuzz. You roll around fighting blow dryers and hair combs. What’s that, popcorn? Oh, no! I’m getting hit! I’m losing my fuzz! Now I’m… naked. Yeah. Whoever came up with this is an asshole! Whoever came up with this is an ass[bleep]! Ass! Hole? Ass[bleep]! Television makes a lot of sense. #32, “Shooting Gallery”. The easiest shooting game ever. The targets never disappear until you hit them, there’s no time limit, you never run out of ammo, and you can’t die. Which means the game will never end. Fortunately, you can go back to the menu by pausing the game and hitting Select. Ugh, except for this game. The one fucking game that doesn’t end crashes when you try to quit. Reset. #33, “Lollipops”. Are you kidding me? Why not a sword or a machine gun? Who wants a fucking lollipop? How do you climb up a ladder? Wanna take a guess? Pushing Up on the D-pad? No, you jump. Who the hell jumps up a ladder? And you know what? The controls in all these games are so bad, I’ve forgotten that B is jump and A is attack. I’ve been playing for so long, I’ve sort of adapted to its crap factor. I swear, next time I play a regular platformer, I’m gonna try jumping with B. #34, “Evil Empire”. Ugh, game sprites so small you need a magnifying glass? That seems to be a theme here, too. Look at that. There’s some crazy shit going on over there. I wanna join the party. Oops, dying in mid-air. I can understand dying because you’re jumping from too high, but can’t they at least make you die when you hit the ground? #35, “Sombreros”. Well, I guess you’re wearing a sombrero, shooting at vacuum cleaners on the street. Not much to say. I’ve lost all hope. 52 games, they all probably suck. I could think of some pretty bad games, like Little Red Hood, that’s a horrible game, but at least it’s one horrible game, not 52! You know what’s more fun than playing Action 52? 52-card pickup. You know how you play that? Pick up the cards! #36, “Storm Over the Desert”. Ooh, another title screen. So you’re an army tank shooting at other army tanks which happen to be pink. Also, there’s no way to die. Anything you touch will explode. Those pink tanks are fucking pussies. What the hell? A giant Saddam Hussein? How did they fuck up the scale this bad? The soldiers aren’t giant, so why Saddam? Now I’m getting tired of this. Can someone at least try to kill me? Hey, you! You! Get over here! Ungh! Pause and Select, get me out of here. Well, at least we’re in the home stretch. The third and final menu screen. Another thing that gets incredibly annoying, whenever you die or reset, you have to go back to the first menu every single time. So it’s hard to keep track where you left off. #37, “Mash Man”. Well, Mash Man looks like Fuzz Power with clothes on. Jumping on eyeballs in front of Legoland. Ugh, next game. #38, “They Came”. They… came from where? From space? No, that can’t be. Ugh, next. #39, “Lazer League”. Well, I’m glad they spelled “lazer” with a Z. Because that’s how you say it. You don’t say “laser”. By the way, horizontal 2D space shooter. Next. #40, “Billy Bob”. This is different. It’s like Indiana Jones, except it’s Billy Bob. I’m kind of stunned that this game has some fluent animation here. Of course. I should’ve learned. In Action 52, you cannot jump down. You will hit the air so hard you will die. You can’t jump to the ledge, either. That doesn’t work. And if you stand there too long, you die! So, how do you get over? I don’t know. Second screen of the game, and it’s a dead end. #41, “City of Doom”. You’re climbing the tallest building in the world, while the tenants throw bowling balls at you. That’s it. It goes on… and on… and on. How tall is this building?! It must lead into outer space- Oh, no. Please, please, not space. #42, “Bits and Pieces”. Ooh. A monster game. You’re a guy in a cemetery jumping over monsters. That’s it. You jump… and jump… and jump. You know what would be nice? An attack? Or, how about a health bar? How about anything like a normal fucking game? What were they thinking? #43, “Beeps and Blips”. You’re a shape shooting at other shapes. What are these? Reject sprites from other video games thrown together? #44, “Manchester”. A guy jumping on music boxes punching in the air. I don’t get it. #45, “Boss”. Who would think Boss means a frog running around with a gun getting ambushed by falling bombs? That’s what they should’ve called it, Bombs. There’s no way to avoid them! If you go too early, the bomb gets you. If you go too late, the next one gets you. #46, “Dedant”. You’re an ant trying to make other ants “Dedants”. Like the Pink Panther. [singing the Pink Panther theme] Dedant. Dedant. Dedant, dedant, dedant, dedant. [normal] But if the ants make it to the bottom of the screen, you’re fucked. Because you can only move left and right. What makes this ant different from the rest? Oh, it’s pink. And anything pink in this game sucks. #47, “Hambo”. A pig version of Rambo? No, that would’ve been too clever. It’s just a guy jumping over 8-balls and shit. Or trying to jump over. This is fucking horseshit! How did they fuck up the jumping controls so bad? Have the programmers ever played another video game? Moving on. #48, “Time Warp Tickers”. You’re a pair of fingers in checkerboard land with upside down doors. What kind of drugs were they on? Was this game even made by a human being? “Time?” When you kill things, it says “Time?” What does that mean? Time to play another fucking game? #49, “Jigsaw”. It crashed. Oh, thank god. Next game. #50, “Ninja Assault”. Another beat ’em up, if you even call it that. No strategy. You just mash buttons. [imitating game sound effects] Hough! Hough! Hough! #51, “Robbie the Robot”. More like “Robbie the Sunglass-Wearing Bart Simpson Look-Alike in a Blue Dress”. Guess how this game works? You move to the right and shoot. That’s all. Nothing can stop you. You could literally play this game with your eyes closed. Until the second level, when there’s holes. Now you’re screwed. I can’t believe they sold this shitfest for $199! That’s about how much it costs for a video game console, pretty much. You could take $199, stand on a bridge, and just throw it all away! You’d rather do anything then spend it on a broken down, dysfuctional disaster of video game programming! With games that crash, hideous jumping control, random characters, microscopic sprites, a marathon of mediocre space shooters, dying in mid-air, problems with proportion, misleading titles, misleading power-ups, embarrassing weapons, seizure-inducing backgrounds, lack of enemies, games you can’t win, games you can’t lose, games that make no sense whatsoever, shitty graphics, shitty music, shitty menus, and a fuckton of other things! It should’ve been illegal for them to sell this rotten shitload of putrid fuck for any price! I feel humiliated to live on the same planet as someone who designed an electronic abomination of this magnitude! Could they have tried making one good game? As opposed to 52 horrible games? Quality over quantity. That’s our lesson here. Well, there’s one game left, so it has one last chance to redeem itself. Could this be the one that all the effort went into? Could there be a cherry on top of this shit sundae? We can only hope.