Galak-Z is a shooting while flying game. There’s a ton of missions to do. And you can also upgrade your weapons. The visuals are very good and the game mechanics are simple but engaging. You may spend a lot of time here. Don’t get fooled by its simple mechanics because this game will make you think. And there is a lot of stages to be completed, the visual is very colorful and the music is relaxing, you may try this game if you just want to have a relaxing gaming. Paladins is a 5v5 shooting game with different game modes such as Onslaught were you need to control an area and collect up to 400 tickets to win, Deathmatch were the first team to reach 40kills wins, and Siege were you need to secure a capture point then push the payload towards your opponent’s base. You can also set your shooting style into a 1st person or 3rd person perspective. And you will be given a few characters to play on and then if you gain enough coins you can buy new ones. You can also use real money to unlock all characters or buy a skin for your avatar or weapons. And each character has a role and unique ability, so forming a team with different roles will improve your win rate. If you can’t get Smash Bro. yet, you may consider Brawlhalla. . It has the same mechanics but just different characters and FREE. . There are free characters you can play and it has an offline and online function. Offline is where you can play with your friends up to 4 players. Or join a tournament and try to be the champion. While in Online you can play with other players around the globe and earn coins to buy new characters but you can also spend real money to customize your character. And its online connectivity doesn’t require Nintendo online subscription. Who doesn’t love demos? right? but for me, this demo is a free game. You can play 1v1 using your joycons or if you have more, you can play up to four players and you can also play by yourself, setting bots as your enemy. . But if you want to unlock all the playable characters and different game modes you have to buy the full version. But for me, this demo already gave the core gameplay of Puyo Puyo and Tetris. And this demo doesn’t have any limit on how many matches you can play. 100 players will be drop on an island and you need to collect weapons and materials to survive. It’s not your typical shooting game because of the ability to make or construct an obstacle which can change the outcome of a fight. It has different game modes that you can try. Mastering shooting and constructing may take time but if you really love battle royale games with the graphics of a home console on the go then add this game to your gallery now. Arena of Valor is a MOBA game on the go with the graphics of its counterpart in PC. There are free characters so you can play right away you can also buy new ones by grinding coins thru completing matches, and it’s also a good way to improve your skills and be familiar with the game. you can also spend money on cosmetic purposes but this doesn’t affect the game. It is not a pay-to-win-game and it depends only on your skills. Warframe is a third person shooting game. If you like ninjas wielding a sword and shooting guns then this game is for you. You will be exploring the solar system to complete missions. The graphics are insanely great for a free-to-play game. And it doesn’t require Nintendo online membership to access the game. So if you have free space of 12.5gb then you should get this one. If you love Minecraft and pokemon then this one is for you, In this game, You have to complete various stages with different pokemon and level up your team. While completing a mission you may pick up berries and this will give you the ability to cook and attract new kinds of pokemon. So If you like grinding games then you should download this one. Fallout shelter is a 2d simulation game. You need to build a community inside a vault underground. you have to build and upgrade your rooms, weapons, and clothing. you also need to defend your vault from attackers such as monsters and other survivors. you can also send your people to explore the land to gain materials and caps used for upgrading. You may spend real money to speed up your progress but you can also complete the game without spending even a penny. There are a lot of stages and side quest here. and while on a mission you will be able to pick up a new weapon, each weapon has its unique shooting style that you can use to destroy your enemy. You can also customize your kitten but you have to spend real money or just grind up for coins while completing the missions.
a rocky landscape Help me, or else I am lost! This devious snake
will soon catch up with me. I see him approaching. Oh, rescue me!
Protect me! Die, monster,
at our hands! Rejoice! The heroic deed has been done. Thanks to our brave intervention
he is rescued. A young man,
handsome and fair. I have never set eyes
on such a charming youth. As pretty as a picture. If I should fall in love,
it would have to be with this young man. Let us hasten to our Queen,
to give her this good news. Perhaps this fair man
can give her peace of mind. You two go tell her,
I will stay here. No, I will stay and keep guard.
-No, I will protect him… I will stay here. -I’ll keep guard.
-I will protect him. I’ll stay. -I’ll keep guard.
-I’ll protect. So I must go? So I must go? That would be a fine thing. They want to be alone with him… but that is not going to happen. They want to be alone with him… but that is not going to happen. What I wouldn’t give
for a life with this young man. If only I had him
all to myself. Yet no one is going.
This will not do. It would be best
if I go now. Charming youth, fare you well.
Until we meet again. Where am I? Am I imagining I’m still alive? Or has a higher power saved me? The snake… Dead? What’s that noise? Where am I?
I don’t know where I am. Who is that? The bird-catcher, that’s me.
Always cheerful, hip hip hooray. My reputation is known
to young and old throughout the land. I’m good at catching birds
and know a lot about whistling. So I can be happy and merry,
because all the birds are mine. The bird-catcher, that’s me.
Always cheerful, hip hip hooray. My reputation is known
to young and old throughout the land. I wish I had a net for girls.
I’d catch them by the dozen. Then I’d lock them up
and they would all be mine. And if all the girls were mine,
I’d barter plenty of sweets. And the girl I liked best,
I would quickly give my sweets. And if she kissed me,
she would be my wife and I her husband. And she would sleep right at my side,
while I rock her like a child. Hey there.
Tell me, friend, who might you be? A man like you.
But one who wears trousers. And who are you?
-A prince, of royal blood. I don’t understand.
Do explain. My father is a monarch who rules
over many lands and peoples. Are there lands and peoples
beyond these mountains? Many thousands. Now tell me where we are.
-Among valleys and mountains. But what is this region called?
Who rules here? I cannot tell you that any more than
how I came into the world. Don’t you know where you were born
or who your parents are? A cheerful old man
raised and fed me. He was probably your father?
-That I don’t know. Did you not know your mother?
-No. All I know is where my straw hut is,
which protects me from rain and cold. But how do you live?
-By eating and drinking, just like everyone. How do you manage that?
-Through exchange. I catch all kinds of birds
for the star-blazing Queen. Star-blazing Queen? If only she were
the powerful Queen of the Night. Have you ever had the fortune
of seeing this goddess of the night? Stay there, I bid you.
And don’t you dare… Because when I get my hands
on someone, I’m as strong as a giant. Then you must have saved me
from that poisonous snake. Snake?
Is it dead or alive? It seems you only
want to dismiss my gratitude. But tell me, how could you
have beaten this monster? You don’t carry a weapon.
-I don’t need one. My firm grip is stronger than a weapon. So, you’ve strangled him?
-Aha, that’s my name. Look over there, my friend.
-Who are these ladies? They collect my birds and pay me
in daily wine, bread and sweet figs. They must be awfully pretty.
-No! You ask if they are beautiful?
I can answer this: I have never in my life
seen anything more lovely. Here, my beauties,
I’ll hand over my birds to you. Today water instead of wine.
-And instead of cake, this stone. What? A stone for food?
-And instead of sweet figs, this. We’re the ones who saved you, young man.
Happiness and bliss await you. Our great Queen sends you
this portrait of her daughter. If these traits
won’t leave you indifferent, she said… then happiness, honour
and glory are your share. This portrait is enchantingly beautiful. Beauty such as none has ever seen. This divine face
fills my heart with a new sensation. Though I can’t name it,
I feel it burning like a fire. Could this feeling be love? Yes, it’s love
and nothing else. If only I could find her. If only she were here. I would… Warmly and virtuously –
what would I do? I would press her rapturously
to my breast. And then she would
be mine forever. Arm yourself with courage
and steadfastness. The Queen…
-…has ordered me to tell you… That the way to happiness
is open to you. What is that?
-Stay calm. Our Queen is coming.
She is coming. Do not tremble,
my dear son… for you are innocent,
wise and virtuous. A young man such as you can best comfort
this poor mother’s heart. It is my destiny to suffer… since I was robbed of my daughter. And with her, all my happiness. A villain
made off with her. I can still see how she trembled… how fearfully she struggled. I had to stand and watch
as they took her from me. ‘Ah help’
was all she could say. But all her pleading was in vain… for my aid was feeble. for my aid was feeble. You shall go and free her. You will be my daughter’s liberator. And if I see you return as victor,
then she will be yours forever. He can talk of punishment,
for he has lost the power of speech. I can do nothing but pity you,
because I’m too weak to help. I can do nothing but pity you… because I’m too weak to help. The Queen pardons you,
revokes your punishment. Now Papageno can talk again.
-But lie no more. I’ll lie no more.
-Let this lock be a warning to you. If only all liars received
such a lock on their mouths. Instead of hate, slander
and black bile… there would be brotherhood and love. Instead of hate, slander
and black bile… there would be brotherhood and love. Prince, accept this gift
from our Queen. The magic flute will protect
and support you in greatest misfortune. It will grant you mighty powers
to change the passions of men. It changes sorrow to joy… and makes bachelors fall in love. Such a flute is worth more
than gold or a crown. It will bring contentment
and human happiness. If you will permit me, fair ladies,
I’ll take my leave. You can certainly take your leave,
but our Queen commands you… to go with the prince
to Sarastro’s stronghold. No, thank you.
I’ve heard he is as fierce as a tiger. Sarastro will have me plucked,
roasted and fed to his dogs. The prince will protect you.
Be his servant in return. The prince can go to the devil.
I value my life. If I don’t take care,
he’ll steal away like a thief. This treasure is for you.
-What might be inside? You’ll hear little bells ring inside.
-Will I be able to play them? Certainly. Silver chimes and magic flutes
will be there to protect you. Farewell.
We take our leave. Farewell and until we meet again. But, fair ladies, tell us
where the stronghold can be found. Three boys, young, handsome and wise,
will accompany you on your journey. They will act as your guides. Follow their advice alone. Three boys, young, handsome and wise,
will accompany us on our journey. They will act as your guides. Follow their advice alone. Farewell.
We take our leave. Farewell and until we meet again. Hey, slaves.
Bring her to me. Come in, sweet little dove.
-Oh, what torture! Your life is lost.
-I’m not afraid of death… but my mother
will surely die of grief. Here, slaves. Chain her up.
My hatred shall destroy you. Rather let me die, barbarian,
if nothing can move you. Go away!
Leave me alone with her. Where am I then? I can see people.
Come, I will go inside. A young, gentle girl,
paler even than chalk. That is surely the devil. Have pity!
Spare me! Mother! Who are you? The bird catcher
of the star-blazing Queen. My mother? Your name?
-Papageno. I’ve heard your name often. But I’ve never seen you. The same for me. But you know my good, loving mother? If you’re the daughter
of the Queen of the Night, yes. But I am.
-We will see about that. Brown eyes. Red lips. Dark hair. Everything’s true to life,
except for hands and feet. Stop. Just a moment. You’re not supposed to have hands
and feet, for they are not in this picture. Show me the picture.
-But… Quickly. Show me. Yes, that’s me.
Who gave it to you? When I got to your mother’s palace,
to give her my birds, this morning… I saw a man who called himself a prince. A prince?
What’s his name? Tamino. Your mother presented him with your image
and from that moment he loved you. So he loves me? Oh, say it again.
I like to hear the word ‘love’ so. Come quick. We must make haste. You will be surprised when you see him. Go on, then. I’ll take the risk.
-Wait. Come on. But… Maybe this is a trick. Maybe
you’re one of Sarastro’s evil spirits. An evil spirit, I? I am the kindest spirit in the world. Forgive me if I have offended you.
You have a sensitive heart. Certainly I have a sensitive heart.
But what good is it to me? I often want to take my own life because
Papageno doesn’t have a Papagena. So you haven’t a wife yet? Not even a girlfriend,
let alone a wife. Patience, my friend.
The heavens will take care of you, too. You will be given a girlfriend.
Sooner than you might think. If only it would happen sooner. Men in love
never lack a good heart. Sharing these sweet urges
is women’s first duty. We want to enjoy love. It’s only through love that we live. Love sweetens every sorrow. Every creature pays homage to it. It spices up the days of our lives. It forms part of nature. Its high purpose
clearly proclaims: Nothing is nobler
than woman and man. Man and woman… And woman and man… They approach the divine. Man and woman and woman and man… They approach the divine. This is the path
that leads to your goal. Yet you must conquer
like a man, youth. So heed our words: Be resolute,
patient and silent. Tell me, dear lads,
if I can rescue Pamina. That is not for us to say. Be resolute,
patient and silent. In short, be a man. For then, youth,
you will triumph like a man. The words of wisdom of these boys
are forever engraved on my heart. Where am I now? Is this the seat of the Gods? The gates and pillars show… that Wisdom, Labour and Art live here. Where activity reigns
and idleness disappears… vice will soon
lose all its might. I will bravely
enter this gate. My purpose is noble,
true and pure. Tremble, cowardly villain! To save Pamina… is my duty. Go back! Back? Then I’ll try my luck here. Go back!
-They cry ‘go back’ here as well? There’s another door.
Perhaps I can find the entrance here. Whereto, audacious stranger? What do you seek in this sanctuary? That which belongs
to virtue and love. These are words of great import. But how will you find such things? You are not led by virtue and love,
but by bloodthirsty vengeance. Nothing but vengeance for this villain.
-You will not find him among us. Does Sarastro rule in these parts?
-Yes, Sarastro rules here. Surely not in the Temple of Wisdom?
-He rules in the Temple of Wisdom. Then it is all a sham! Leaving so soon? Yes, I want to go, happy and free.
I don’t need to see the Temple. Explain yourself.
You’re suffering from delusions. Sarastro lives here,
that’s enough for me. If you value your life,
stay here and speak. You despise Sarastro?
-I despise him forever. Give me your reason. He is inhuman, a tyrant. Have you proof of this? Your proof is an unhappy woman,
suffering grief and woe. So a woman
has blinded you so? A woman does little and chatters much.
Do you believe that blather? If only Sarastro would reveal
the reason for his actions to you. The reason is clear. Did the robber not ruthlessly
take Pamina from her mother? What you say is true. Where is she, whom he stole from us?
Has she already been sacrificed? This, dear son,
I’m not at liberty to tell you. Explain this riddle,
don’t mislead me. My tongue is bound
by oath and duty. And when
will all be revealed? As soon as friendship in this sanctuary
leads you to an everlasting bond. Endless night… when will you pass? When will the light find me? Soon, young man… or never! Soon, you say, or never? Invisible ones, tell me:
Is Pamina still alive? Pamina… is still alive. She lives!
I thank you. If only I were able,
in your honour, almighty ones… to show my thanks
in every note that sounds. How powerful your magic tone is,
dear flute… your playing brings joy
even to wild animals. How powerful your magic tone is… dear flute, your playing
brings joy even to wild animals. And yet Pamina does not come. Pamina! Listen to me. In vain! Where… Oh, where can I find you? Ha! I hear it: that is Papageno. Perhaps he’s already seen Pamina.
Perhaps they’re both hurrying my way. Perhaps… Perhaps those tones
will lead me to her. Quick steps, swift courage,
protect us from guile and fury. We must find Tamino,
otherwise they’ll catch us. Noble youth.
-Quiet. Here, allow me. What greater joy could there be?
Tamino hears us already. I hear the sound of the flute.
What joy if I can find him. Quickly now. What joy if I can find him. Quickly now! Ha! Now I have caught you. I’ll teach you manners. To deceive me, Monostatos.
Come quickly, slaves! Now we’re done for.
-Come quickly, slaves! Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Come, pretty chimes, let’s hear the
little bells till their ears are ringing. What a beautiful sound.
Such a pretty ring. I’ve never heard
or seen anything like it. I’ve never heard
or seen anything like it. If every good man
could find bells like that… All his enemies
would vanish effortlessly… And he would live
in perfect harmony. Only the harmony of friendship
relieves all grievances. Without such sympathy,
there is no happiness on earth. Long live Sarastro! What does this mean? We’re done for.
Sarastro is coming. Oh, if only I were a mouse,
then I would hide. Were I as little as a snail,
I’d crawl into my house. My child,
what will we say? The truth… even if it were a crime. Long live Sarastro! It is to him we gladly submit. In his wisdom,
may he always enjoy life. He is our idol,
to him we are devoted. Lord, I have done wrong. I wanted to escape from your power. But the fault is not mine: The villain coveted my love. That is why, o Lord,
I ran away. Stand up, be not afraid,
dear child. Even without questioning you further
I can see into your heart: You love another dearly. I don’t want to force you to love… but I shall not give you your freedom. I don’t want to force you to love… but I shall not give you your freedom. Filial duty calls me… because my mother…
-Is in my power. You would be unhappy
if I left you in her hands. How sweet my mother’s name
sounds to me. She is… A proud woman.
A man must guide your hearts… for without a man, all women
tend to overstep their boundaries. Come here, proud young man.
Here is Sarastro, our Lord. It is he! -It is she!
-I can hardly believe it. It is she! -It is he!
-It is not a dream. I’ll put an arm around him,
even if it kills me. What is the meaning of this?
-Such impudence. This is going too far. Your slave lies at your feet.
Punish this villain. Together with this strange bird,
he was planning to abduct Pamina. But I managed to nab him. My vigilance…
-Deserves to be rewarded. Give this man at once…
-Your favour alone makes me rich. Seventy-seven strokes on his soles. This is not the reward I had hoped for.
-Do not thank me. It is my duty. Long live Sarastro,
who is divinely wise! He rewards and punishes
in equal measure. Bring these two strangers
to our Temple of Trial. Cover their heads. They must be purified first. When justice and virtue… strew the great path with fame… earth becomes a heavenly kingdom… and mortals are like the Gods. Earth becomes a heavenly kingdom
and mortals are like the Gods. Thank you for coming, friends. We are currently in a time of crisis. With a clear conscience I declare
that our gathering today… is one of the most crucial
that we have ever held. Tamino, a princeling,
is at the gate of our Temple. He wishes to rule
as a wise monarch. He awaits enlightenment. Pamina has been destined by the Gods
for this noble youth. This is the reason I seized her
from her conceited mother. This woman imagines herself superior
and hopes by deception and superstition… to bring the people under her spell. In this she will not succeed. Tamino himself will help us… and as one of the initiated,
he will reward virtue but punish vice. Great Sarastro,
we know and admire your wisdom. Can Tamino also withstand
the harsh trials that await him? He is a prince.
-And what’s more, he is a human being. But what if the youth
were to lose his life? Then he will enjoy the delights
of the Gods earlier than we. Is he virtuous? Virtues. And discreet? Discretion. Is he benevolent? Benevolence. Regard him as worthy,
and follow my example. Moved by the unity of your hearts, Sarastro
thanks you in the name of humanity. O Isis and Osiris, bestow the spirit
of wisdom on this new couple. You, who guide the travellers’ steps… patiently fortify them in danger. Let their trials bear fruit. But if they should meet their death… then reward their virtue and courage… and receive them into your abode. Get Pamina. Where am I? This silence is terrifying. Where is my swain? He is waiting for you
to say a last farewell. A last farewell?
Where is he? Here. Your friends sure are chummy. Stranger, what do you seek?
-A better world. How do you plan to achieve that?
-Through friendship and love. Are you willing to fight for these
with your life? Even if it should lead to your death?
-Yes. Will you submit to every trial?
-To every one. Get back. Will I never see you again?
-You’ll see each other again in happiness. Mortal dangers await you.
-May the Gods protect me. A foreboding tells me
that you will not escape death. May the Gods’ will be done.
Their wish is my command. Oh, if you loved me as I love you,
you would not be so calm. Believe me, I feel the same.
I will be faithful to you forever. It is time to say goodbye.
-This separation is so hard. Tamino must go now.
-Pamina, I really must go. Now he must go.
-Now I must go. Farewell.
We will see each other again. The hour has come.
-Oh golden repose. Return! Farewell.
-We will see each other again. Do you too wish to fight
for wisdom and for love? I’m not much of a fighter.
Nor do I really yearn for wisdom. I’m more a child of nature,
content with sleep, food and drink. And if possible,
I’d like to capture a pretty little wife. That will not happen
if you do not submit to our trials. What are these trials? Comply with all our laws
even when faced with death. Then I’ll stay single. But what if it could get you
a virtuous, beautiful girl? Is she young?
-Young and beautiful. And her name?
-Papagena. I’d like to see her,
if only out of curiosity. You may see her.
But you may not speak a word to her. The Gods impose a salutary silence
on you too, prince. Otherwise, both of you will be lost. You shall see Pamina,
but you may not speak to her. And so shall your trials commence. A terrible night!
Papageno, are you still there? Of course. Where do you think we are now? Where?
If it weren’t so dark… Woe is me.
-Sounds like you’re afraid. Not at all, only a chill
is going down my spine. My last hour has struck. What? You in these ghoulish parts?
You will never escape alive. Tamino, your death is certain.
Papageno, you are lost. No, no! That is too awful.
-Papageno, keep quiet. Are you to break your oath
not to speak to women here? We’re both done for.
-Keep quiet! Always quiet! Always quiet! The Queen has
stolen into the Temple. What?
She’s here in the Temple? Do you recklessly persist in
disregarding your pledge? Tamino, you are lost.
Think of the Queen. There is much whispering
that the priests mean to wrong you. A wise man verifies everything
and does not trust idle rumours. There is much whispering
that the priests mean to wrong you. All who vow allegiance to them
will go straight to hell. That is unthinkable.
Tamino, is it true? Women’s gossip. But the Queen says so too.
-She is also a woman. Trust my word
and fulfil your duty. Why do you dismiss us like this? Papageno is silent too.
Say something. I would like to, but… you see that I may not. What a dreadful disgrace
that I can’t stop talking. What a disgrace
that you can’t stop talking. Ashamed, we must leave them,
because neither says a word. Ashamed, they must leave us,
because neither says a word. A man is strong-minded
and knows what he can say. The sacred temple has been desecrated.
Off to hell with those women. Alas! Alas! And what was
the terrible crime I committed? They wanted to beat the soles of my feet
because of an insignificant little flower? It is only thanks to this day
that I’m still in one piece. Ah, there is the chaste little flower. The girl makes my head spin. The fire burning inside me
will consume me yet. If I were sure that I was alone here,
I would venture another attempt. What a fuss love is. Everything feels the joys of love,
cuddles and coos. Only I must avoid love,
because a monster is ugly. Have I not been given a heart?
Am I not made of flesh and blood? To live forever without a woman
would be hell on earth. That’s why I want to kiss
and be tender. Dear moon, forgive me.
A woman has captured my heart. White is beautiful, I must kiss her.
Moon, hide yourself. Should it give you too much sorrow,
then close your eyes. Back. Mother!
-My child! Where is the young man
I sent to you? He has joined the Brotherhood. Unhappy daughter!
Then I have lost you forever. Oh mother, let us flee. Under your protection
I can face any danger. Dear child, your mother
can no longer protect you. When your father died,
I lost all my power. He freely handed over the power
to Sarastro and his Initiates. The Sevenfold Sun Cross;
Sarastro wears it on his chest. Why?
-Why? I asked him why. ‘Wife’, he said, ‘Sarastro will guard it
as bravely as I have until now. Do not look for knowledge
which exceeds the female mind. It is your duty to allow yourself
and your daughter be led by wise men.’ Dear mother, is the young man
then also lost to me forever? Could I not love the youth as one of
the Initiates just as I love him now? You would love a man
allied to my archenemy? Who is set on destroying me? My father himself was
allied to these wise men too. He praised their goodness,
wisdom and virtue. What! My daughter
defends these barbarians? Do you see this blade?
It has been sharpened for Sarastro. You must kill him
and bring me the mighty Sun Cross. But mother dearest…
-Silence! Hell’s vengeance burns in my heart
and death and despair flame around me. If you do not make Sarastro feel
the pains of death… then you’re no longer
my daughter. Then you’re no longer
my daughter. Then you’re no longer
my daughter. Then you’re no longer
my daughter. Disowned and abandoned
forever. Destroyed will be
all the bonds of nature. Disowned, abandoned and destroyed
are the bonds of nature. All the bonds of nature. If you don’t bring about
Sarastro’s death. Hear… Gods of Vengeance,
hear a mother’s vow. Must I commit murder?
I cannot. What am I to do?
-Put your trust in me. Why do you tremble?
The murder plan? You know?
-Everything. There is only one way
to save you and your mother. Love or death. Speak!
Your life is at stake. Never.
-Then it’s your life. Lord, they swore to kill you,
that’s why I wanted to avenge you. I know that your soul is as vile
as your desires. Then I shall seek out the mother,
if the daughter is not to be mine. Lord, do not punish my mother.
The pain of my absence… I know that she is intent on revenge
on me and mankind. But you shall see how I will
take my revenge on your mother. This thing of darkness
I acknowledge mine. Revenge is unheard of
within these sacred halls. And if a man has fallen,
love will lead him to his duty. Then he wanders happily, guided by
a friend’s hand, to a better land. Within these sacred walls,
where one loves his brother… no traitor can lurk,
because enemies are forgiven. Whoever does not observe such lessons,
is not deserving of his humanity. Tamino, where are we? Welcome, young man.
Your steadfast behaviour has triumphed. Many rough and dangerous paths
await you still… but assisted by the Gods,
you shall successfully walk them. Then let us, pure of heart,
continue on our way. And you… What now? Get up! I lie here feebly
because there’s not a thing to eat. Come on, be a man. If the Gods are to grant me a Papagena,
why then brave all these dangers? You will have to answer that for yourself.
You’re on your own now. Farewell, prince. You will see Pamina,
but you may not speak to her. With all this roaming around,
you can forget about love. Tamino!
Where are we now? I haven’t eaten or drunk a thing
since we got here. I keep looking at this stone,
waiting for it to change back into bread. Surely I’m allowed
to talk to myself. And we can also talk to each other,
since we are men. Not even a drop of water from these folks,
let alone anything else. We welcome you once again
to Sarastro’s realm. He returns what was taken from you:
the flute and the bells. Unless you want to scorn this food,
eat and drink merrily. When you see us for a third time,
joy will be the reward for your courage. Courage, Tamino. The goal is near. You, Papageno… remain silent. Tamino! Food! We are currently in a time of crisis. Does anyone know a recipe
with leeks and panettone? Play your flute, why don’t you.
I’d rather eat this. Do you think the wine cellar provides
something good, as well? Tamino? This is great wine. Here you are!
What luck! I heard your flute
and hastened toward its sound. But are you distressed? Why don’t you speak? Have I offended you? My dearest Tamino…
I turn to you for comfort and help. Do you love me no more? Do you love me no more? Papageno, tell me
what is wrong with my friend? You too? Why don’t you speak? This is more painful
than death. Ah, I feel it,
it has disappeared. Amorous bliss is gone forever. Never will those happy hours
return to my heart. See, Tamino… These tears
flow for you alone. If you don’t feel love’s longing… then I will only find peace in death. If you don’t feel love’s longing… then I will only find peace in death. See, Tamino,
I can also keep quiet if I have to. Yes, in such a case
I can hold my own. Oh Isis and Osiris… What bliss! Sunlight has driven away
the dark night. Soon the noble youth
will start a new life. Then he will be committed
to us completely. His spirit is bold,
his heart is pure. Soon he will be worthy of us. You go ahead,
I’ll come later. The strongest remains here. You’re the only friend I have,
my dear bottle. It’s interesting what you say…
Really? Thanks. You have a family. A girl or little wife
is what Papageno desires. Such a sweet little dove
wouldn’t that be bliss. Then I could enjoy my food and drink,
measure myself with princes. Enjoy life as a wise man
and feel like I’m in Elysium. I measure myself with princes… enjoy life as a wise man
and feel like I’m in Elysium. A girl or little wife
is what Papageno desires. Such a sweet little dove
wouldn’t that be bliss. If none will offer me love,
the burning flame will consume me. But if a woman’s lips kiss me,
I shall at once be well again. A girl or little wife
is what Papageno desires. Such a sweet little dove
wouldn’t that be bliss. Why will no sweet, charming girls
give me the time of day? If none will help me out of my misery,
then I’ll die of grief. Why are there none
who will give me the time of day? If none will help me out of my misery,
then I’ll die of grief. Tell me, nameless beauty. Is this
the usual welcome for strangers here? Of course, my angel. Come, old girl, sit next to me. How old are you anyway?
-Eighteen years and two minutes. Eighteen years and two minutes. Aha, a young little angel.
Do you have a lover? Of course.
-Is he as young as you? Not really.
He is twenty years older. Twenty years older than you?
That must be a great love. And what’s your lover’s name? Papageno. And where is he, this Papageno?
-There. Am I supposed to be your lover?
-Yes, my angel. And what is your name?
-Papagena. Not so quick, my angel.
I need to think about this. I advise you not to hesitate.
Your hand, otherwise… Friendless you must
renounce the world forever. Friendless?
Renounce the world forever? Then I’d rather an old woman
than none at all. Look, there’s my hand on it.
I shall always be true to you. As long as I don’t find anyone prettier. You swear to it?
-Yes, I swear to it. Then you will see how much
your little wife will love you. Away with you, young lady,
he is not yet worthy of you. You have spoken. Friendless you must
renounce the world forever. Announcing the morning, the sunbeams
shine upon its golden path. Soon superstition will disappear.
Soon the wise man triumphs. Oh, sweet peace, descend,
return to the hearts of men. Then is the Earth a heavenly kingdom
and mortals are like Gods. But see, despair torments Pamina.
She is not herself. She is racked by the pain
of rejected love. Let us console her. Her fate touches us.
If only her young man were here. There she is.
Let us see what she does. Are you now my bridegroom?
Through you I end my sorrow. What dark words does she speak?
The poor girl is close to madness. Patience, my beloved,
soon we shall be joined in matrimony. Madness rages in her mind.
Suicide is written on her face. Dear girl, look at us. If the man who I can never hate
abandons his beloved, then I shall die. My mother gave me this.
-God punishes suicide. Rather to die by this iron,
than to perish of grief. Mother, because of you I suffer
and your curse pursues me. Girl, will you come with us?
-Yes, my cup of woe is full. False youth, farewell.
See, Pamina dies because of you. May this iron kill me.
-Unhappy one, stop! Your young man would die of grief,
because he loves you alone. He loves me, but hides his feelings?
Turns his face away from me? Why did he not speak to me? This we may not say,
but we will show him to you. You’ll see that his heart is devoted to
you, and that he is facing death for you. Come, we will go to him.
-Take me there, I want to see him. Two hearts burning with love
can never be separated by human hand. Enemies cannot harm them,
because they are protected by the Gods. Whoever walks this path
full of hardship… is purified by fire and water,
air and earth. If he has conquered
his fear of death… he will soar from the earth to heaven. Enlightened, he will be able… to devote himself entirely
to the secrets of Isis. Death shall not stop me
from following the path of virtue. Open the gates of terror: I’ll gladly enter through them. Tamino, stop!
I must see you. Do I hear Pamina’s voice?
Now she can come with me. Now destiny can no longer separate us
even if death awaits us. Am I allowed
to speak to her? You are allowed
to speak to her. What joy to meet again. Happy,
hand in hand, we’ll enter the Temple. A woman unafraid of night and death
is worthy and will be consecrated. Oh, my Tamino,
what bliss! Oh, my Pamina,
what bliss! Here are the gates of terror
which threaten me with death. Wherever you go,
I will be at your side. I myself will lead you,
and love, me. It will strew our path with roses, because
where there are roses, there are thorns. Play then on your magic flute
to protect us on our way. My father cut it
from the thousand-year-old oak… during thunder and lightning
in a raging storm. Come now, play the flute.
It will lead us along this grim path. By the power of music we walk
cheerfully through the night of death. test fire We have walked through blazing fire
and bravely fought the danger. Your tones now shield us against
the water as they did against the fire. water Oh Gods, what a moment.
Isis’ joy is granted us. Triumph! Oh, noble couple!
You have overcome the danger. By Isis you have now been consecrated.
Come, enter the Temple. Papagena! Little dove! My beauty!
In vain, she is lost. I talked and that was wrong,
so this is what I deserve. Ever since
I tasted that wine… since I saw that pretty little woman,
my heart has been on fire. Papagena!
Dear little dove! It is no good.
I’ve had enough of life. Only death can extinguish love
if a heart burns so fervently. I will grace this tree… by tying my neck to it,
because life so offends me. If no one sends me a beautiful girl,
then it’s over and I want to die. Pretty girls,
remember me. If one of you will take pity on me
then I’ll forget about this. Just say yes or no. No one hears me. All is still.
So this is what you want. Go on, Papageno, climb up there, be brave.
Put an end to your life. I’ll just wait a little… until I’ve counted one, two, three. One… Two… Three. All right then, that’s that. Since nothing holds me back… Good night, cruel world. Stop, Papageno.
Think about it. You only live once,
let that be enough. That’s easy for you to say. If your heart burned like mine,
you too would be chasing girls. Ring your bells,
then your little wife will come. I’m a fool to forget
that magic thing. Ring then, little bells.
I must see my darling girl. Ring, little bells, ring,
and fetch me my girl. Papageno,
look behind you. Are you all mine now?
-I’m all yours now. Then be my darling little wife.
-Be the little dove of my heart. What joy it will be
when the Gods remember us… and crown our love with children,
with sweet little children. First a little Papageno.
-And then a little Papagena. Then another Papageno…
-Then another Papagena… It would be the greatest joy… if many Papagenos and Papagenas… are granted the parents. It would be the greatest joy… if many Papagenos and Papagenas… are granted the parents. Quiet! We will soon
make our way into the Temple. But Queen, keep your word.
Your daughter must be my wife. I’ll keep my word:
My daughter will be your wife. Her daughter will be your wife. I hear a terrible noise
like thunder and a waterfall. The noise is fearsome.
It is like the echo of distant thunder. Now they are in the Temple.
-We will take them by surprise. We shall wipe those pietists from the earth
with burning fire and mighty sword. To you,
great Queen of the Night… we make our offering
of vengeance. Shattered is our power.
We are plunged into eternal night. The rays of the sun
drive away the night. Destroy the devious power
of the hypocrites. Hail, you Consecrated Ones! You came through the night. Thanks. Thank you, Osiris. Thanks. Thanks to you too, Isis. Strength has triumphed and blesses
beauty and wisdom with an eternal crown. Strength has triumphed… and blesses beauty and wisdom
with an eternal crown. Beauty and wisdom
with an eternal crown.
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JORDAN: Thank you, Chuck. I will take this from you. You won’t be needing
it where you’re going. Man, your teammates
are right here, and I just long-claimed him. Wow.
That’s embarrassing, Jared. CHUCK: Hello, everyone. My name is Chuck Brungardt,
and I’m the CEO of IllFonic. We’re here playing Predator:
Hunting Grounds today. Who are you over
there, Mr. Gerritzen? JARED: Hi. I’m Jared Gerritzen. I’m the CCO at IllFonic. CHUCK: What’s a CCO? JARED: Chief Creative Officer. CHUCK: So you create things? JARED: I do.
CHUCK: Nice. JARED: With the help
of Tramell and Jordan. CHUCK: Go ahead, Tramell. TRAMELL: That would be a
segue way to me, right? And I am the Vice President
of Art of IllFonic, Tramell Ray Isaac. And now it’s on you. JORDAN: Thank you, Tramell. I’m Jordan Mathewson, the lead designer on
Predator: Hunting Grounds. And today we’re going to
be playing some games. And I’m gonna try
and murder Tramell, and I think Tramell is gonna
try and murder me at some point. TRAMELL: God dammit. Yes, I’m gonna give it
a good old college try. That’s what they say. JORDAN: So we’re gonna
jump into a match here. I’m just wrapping up
some customization, making sure my Fire Team is outfitted with all the correct gear to kill Tramell of course. You guys ready? TRAMELL: Get kitted out. You gotta get
kitted out for that. JORDAN: I got my Pred ready.
I got my Fire Team ready. Let’s do this. So it’s my turn to
be Predator now as I hunt down my
fellow colleagues here. I don’t think any of you guys
stand a chance to be honest. TRAMELL: Wow. CHUCK: Jordan, I’m
gonna kill you so hard. JORDAN: You know when a
cat plays with a mouse? Okay. Okay. Let’s see here. TRAMELL: I just got
startled by some birds. CHUCK: There’s a guy over here. TRAMELL: Hey guy.
What are you doing? Just destroyed that kid. Get outta my face. JORDAN: Look at that. What do you know. Right there, one of those birds
flying away that someone just kicked up. It’s almost like you
guys want to be found. TRAMELL: Yep. I’m going around the back way. JORDAN: Is that you,
Tramell, that I’m watching? TRAMELL: Probably. CHUCK: I’m trying to find
some mud to — TRAMELL: Oh, he’s
shooting at me. CHUCK: Where would
I find some mud? TRAMELL: Look out, laser beams. No! I’m down. JARED: Tramell, what
are you doing, dude? JORDAN: The correct
answer is, yes, looking anywhere that
looks watery, muddy. You can just look straight down, and you’ll be able to
apply mud to yourself. And it will only last
a little bit of time, but it makes it very
difficult for me to see you. JARED: What are you doing?
Why are you over here? CHUCK: Why am I way over there? JORDAN: I’m so close. TRAMELL: I was
snaking around, man. JARED: What the shit? TRAMELL: Oh, get out of here. CHUCK: Normal lasers,
normal force lasers. JORDAN: They’re naturally
occurring in this part of the world obviously. TRAMELL: I needed that. JARED: Wait, where’s
the fourth person? CHUCK: Sorry, I’m coming, guys. TRAMELL: Watch out,
he’s aiming at you. No! CHUCK: It’ll grow back. TRAMELL: Who was that? CHUCK: No, no, no. JARED: How are you down again? TRAMELL: That’s not me.
That’s not me. It’s somebody else. I’m trying to run. Crawl this way. Did you get him? Did you get him up? CHUCK: I’m safe
for the time being. TRAMELL: We’re going
to the objective. I don’t know where
you guys are going. Run. JARED: Why did you
go this way, Tramell? TRAMELL: What? Don’t worry about that, man. Why are you living in the past? JORDAN: Probably the most
important thing about being a Predator is making sure
you pick your moments. I could run right now, and
I probably would succeed, but. CHUCK: You totally
ran right into him. JORDAN: I have the perfect
opportunity now for you guys to get sidetracked by all these AI. BRETT: On the Fire Team,
while we’re down here, other than our objectives,
what should we be not doing? You mentioned kicking up noise, drawing a lot of
attention to ourselves. TRAMELL: I just did
the alarm thing. You should probably not do that. Just follow me, and you’ll
learn all the things not to do. CHUCK: There’s a lot of ways you
can kind of come in and sneak into a camp if you can and try
to avoid the AI where you can. And then there’s some
as soon as you trigger, there’s a guy that will run and
make things — JARED: Oh no. CHUCK: Use your words.
What’s going on? JARED: I don’t know.
I’m down. Jordan shot me. TRAMELL: Oh no. I need
some help there, bro. CHUCK: I’m close. But
this feels suspicious. JARED: Watch out for
that guy over there. TRAMELL: It’s a tarp.
It’s a tarp. Watch out. I got a health kit over here. Get this. I’m gonna need that. JORDAN: Whoa. TRAMELL: I just got healed up. JARED: Help me, save me. TRAMELL: Who’s down? Where you at? I’m coming for you. CHUCK: Swear to goodness. JARED: He shot me in the back. TRAMELL: Shoot him in the head. Just put him out of his misery. It’s too late. It’s too
late for that guy. CHUCK: Oh, there it goes. TRAMELL: Kill him, kill him. JORDAN: I’ll be taking that. TRAMELL: Chuck a grenade at him. JARED: Keep on tagging him.
Keep on tagging him. CHUCK: Get him,
get him, get him. TRAMELL: Grenade. JARED: He’s over here. TRAMELL: Follow the
trail that he’s leaving. JARED: Yeah, so you can kind of
see now on the ground there’s some of his green blood
so you can kind of follow. TRAMELL: He’s got
that green goo. CHUCK: Where did he go? TRAMELL: I’m gonna mud
up so he can’t see me. JARED: Sorry. I got sidetracked with some — TRAMELL: Just slather
on that mud. It feels so good. Oh, dude, I found
some jewels over here. JORDAN: So how are you guys
doing with the mission? TRAMELL: The mission
is to kill you. That’s what I’m trying to do. JARED: Wait, why is
there only three of us? Where’s the fourth? TRAMELL: I don’t know. JORDAN: You didn’t see me rip
his skull out in front of you. TRAMELL: Oh, dude. Did we lose a guy and not know? JORDAN: Brett was sitting there,
and I jumped down and ripped. TRAMELL: Oh wow. CHUCK: Let’s just
stay right here. Let’s just stay right here. JARED: Reinforcements. CHUCK: No, let’s wait for that. TRAMELL: No, I’m
gonna do it now. BRETT: You’re gonna do it now? CHUCK: Tramell just runs off. TRAMELL: Yes, I’m gonna do it. I gotta get your boy back in the
game seeing how you don’t know what he’s doing. BRETT: So of anything I
collected, the currency, if I get my head
ripped off, is that it? TRAMELL: That’s all gone, dude. You know that blue dude
that hits stuff and jewels come out of him? That’s you. I just shot a boar. JARED: There’s actually a way
for you to come back in game so there’s reinforcement points. TRAMELL: I just
called reinforcements. He should be good to go. JORDAN: I don’t think
you did, Tramell. CHUCK: I don’t think you did. TRAMELL: I did. BRETT: The fact that you
have to stand near it. CHUCK: Wait, wait, wait, wait. JARED: He’s coming. Watch out. TRAMELL: I’m pressing
reinforcements. Why is he not — JARED: So that’s a way for you to come back in the game. TRAMELL: Oh snap. Watch out. CHUCK: I’ve been resurrected. JARED: Respawn chance. TRAMELL: Here it is.
You’re welcome. How about that? BRETT: I will try too make
it worth everyone’s while. TRAMELL: I just
saved your life, son. CHUCK: He’s over east.
He’s over east. TRAMELL: Let’s just
track him down. F this mission. BRETT: Oh wait. I see his eyes. TRAMELL: Don’t shoot until you
see the whites of his eyes. BRETT: What if they’re
blinking yellow? TRAMELL: Then kill. BRETT: Is that good? TRAMELL: Destroy them too. Hey, I’m going this way. Why don’t somebody follow me? JARED: Tramell. CHUCK: Let’s go get him.
Let’s go get his back. TRAMELL: Come on. Come on.
We’re a team here man. You guys are the
worst teammates. CHUCK: There’s gonna be no
skull in team pretty soon. TRAMELL: I gotta say,
this map looks — JARED: You think so? TRAMELL: Yeah, I really do. Anybody see him floating
around here somewhere? JARED: Why are we here?
Why are we here. TRAMELL: Waiting for the
final showdown, dude. BRETT: There’s these shipping
crates that need my attention. TRAMELL: The final showdown. All right, come on. All right. I’ll set the trap for you. JARED: Okay. We’re
inside the search area. CHUCK: You guys are the
worst teammates ever. TRAMELL: No man, I’m
just waiting for him. He’s faking us out.
It’s all a fake out. Watch out for that gas. JARED: Why? Why? CHUCK: Oh no, no, no. TRAMELL: Get out of the net. JARED: No. I gotta mash this button. TRAMELL: No. I’m being murdered. Help. Get me out of this net. Help me. Help me. Help me. Help. Help. JORDAN: Around the
corner first, Tramell. TRAMELL: No, that’s not me. Why are you hunting me only? JORDAN: What do you think
I’m hunting you only? TRAMELL: Why? JARED: You just keep on
running off by yourself. TRAMELL: I’m not by myself. I’m right by this guy with
the giant machine gun. JARED: He’s in the camp. He’s in the camp.
He’s in the camp. TRAMELL: I know. There he is. He’s on the roof.
He’s on the roof. There he is right there. What are you doing? What are you waiting on? He’s right in front of you. Come on, man. Jared, I expect better from you. Come on. You just let him shoot you. All right. Come on, man. Get it together. CHUCK: Why don’t we
do the objective? JARED: Oh, now? Look at how much
time has passed. CHUCK: East, east, east. TRAMELL: I don’t know
what that is, dude. I see the compass at
the top of the screen, but I don’t know direction. Oh, there he is.
He’s in the trees. Over there in the trees. CHUCK: Good job, Tramell. TRAMELL: You said east though. I don’t know. JORDAN: I’m just gonna see one
of the alternatives Predator has to healing is also feasting
on the local wildlife. TRAMELL: Who uses
that terminology? JORDAN: A Predator that’s
feasting to replenish his health obviously. TRAMELL: He doesn’t feast.
Is anybody — JARED: No
one’s doing the objectives. BRETT: I got three
relics out of six. TRAMELL: That’s
not the objective. JORDAN: You’re just on
the relics part of this? TRAMELL: That’s you
enriching your life. BRETT: I’m up to four. TRAMELL: What area were you
supposed to be searching? BRETT: My pockets are
full of relics. TRAMELL: Those relics
aren’t gonna save you. All right. Come on now. Everybody do the thing. JORDAN: I have to say, I’ve
never been so relaxed as a Predator in my entire life. For the first time I feel like
I can just relax and enjoy the finer points of
planning my next attack. TRAMELL: You came across
a greedy bunch of Predator hunters. CHUCK: A barrel
just blew up on me. JORDAN: Did you
seriously shoot a barrel? CHUCK: It just blew up. TRAMELL: My bad. CHUCK: And you just took
half my health, man. I was raised to trust. TRAMELL: I’m trying to
lure him out to the open. CHUCK: You’re joking me? TRAMELL: If I kill
his food source, he won’t be feasting
over there in the corner, so I killed a boar. JARED: Oh god, run. BRETT: He’s in the trees.
He’s in the trees. CHUCK: Where’s this last piece? There we go. TRAMELL: I’m shooting stuff. Watch out. BRETT: We have to call
it out every time. TRAMELL: I know because
everybody’s all mad now. Shooting stuff,
what are you doing? Oh no. He’s coming. I think he’s over
there by the rocks. JARED: There he goes. TRAMELL: All right.
I see him now. All right. Did we get all the relics? BRETT: We did. TRAMELL: All right. Now what? BRETT: Reach final
relic location. JORDAN: You guys
have no time left. JARED: Oh man. Don’t worry about us. JORDAN: Hurrying it up. TRAMELL: The plan is to kill
you within the last two minutes. That’s the game plan. Oh, got netted! Help. Help. Somebody cut me free. CHUCK: Serpentine. Serpentine. TRAMELL: Oh, help. Oh no. Oh, you gonna leave me? It’s like that, Chuck? All right, cool. CHUCK: Why are you’re
crawling away from me? You’re crawling away from me. TRAMELL: No, I’m on my feet. CHUCK: Who’s this then? TRAMELL: I don’t know
who the hell that is. JARED: I was ready to
die on these steps. I’m sorry. TRAMELL: He’s gonna
just kill himself. JARED: I was down. It was a trap. TRAMELL: He was gonna
kill himself for the team. CHUCK: Sorry, guys. TRAMELL: Where you at, Chuck?
I want to help. JORDAN: Thank you, Chuck.
I will take this from you. You won’t be needing
it where you’re going. You’re teammates are right here, and I just long-claimed him. Wow. That’s embarrassing, Jared. TRAMELL: Whatever, man.
Forget that guy. JARED: I was dealing with the
guys they didn’t — TRAMELL: Oh man,
Pred 3 got killed? Am I the last one left? JARED: I just died of shock. TRAMELL: Is there any way I can
just get a helicopter out of here without doing any work? JORDAN: They’re not
gonna get you out. You gotta finish the mission. TRAMELL: F that mission, man. People getting killed out here. Just aliens in the forest. What am I supposed to do now? I’m not doing that mission. I’m scared. There’s a dude out there. JORDAN: Take this. Took out some frustrations
on an AI because you guys are presenting zero challenge. TRAMELL: Oh my god. Oh, boar. JARED: Why is this
so hard to go up? Goddamnit, Jordan. TRAMELL: Are you
still alive, dude? JORDAN: Tramell, you have not
been alone this entire time. TRAMELL: I thought
everybody was dead. JORDAN: Now there’s two
minutes left in the match. TRAMELL: I thought
everybody was dead. JORDAN: Find out
where you guys are. TRAMELL: Jared, where are you? JARED: You can check
on the mini-map, bro. TRAMELL: I don’t see you at all. Oh, I got laser
beams on my back. Serpentine. I should probably mud
up so he can’t see me. JORDAN: You would really like
the reinforcements at this point. TRAMELL: Dude, I’m
so hurt right now. I have no juice left.
No more juice. All right. I’m gonna just stand on
the log and cut my chest. Oh, whatever. I’m dead. F you man. JORDAN: Enjoy that
beautiful cut scene of you getting your
skull ripped out. TRAMELL: Man, I wish I had a
grenade I could have just pinned and took out and
shoved in your pants. JORDAN: Jared, I see you
with that mini-gun up there. You’re just gonna
stand your ground? JARED: I think so. JORDAN: You got a minute left. JARED: God. TRAMELL: Jared, where are you? I see you. Looking nice there. Pretty good. Why do you have your
knife out, really? Like, come on, man. At least try to win. JARED: Because I have the
slowest weapons right now. TRAMELL: At least try to
give us a fighting chance. CHUCK: Thirty seconds
get to the chopper. TRAMELL: Take him out. There was no chopper called. He’s taking on AI right now. There he is. Get him. BRETT: Knife him, knife him. TRAMELL: Jared, get him. What are you doing? JORDAN: Come on, Jared. TRAMELL: Jared, come on, man. Oh, dude, he just
wrapped you up. JORDAN: Come on. Get out of it. I’m gonna give you
a fighting chance. TRAMELL: No. Pull it out. Get him. ALL: Oh. BRETT: He just ninja’d you. TRAMELL: Thought you
had the machine gun. JORDAN: You are the absolute
worst team I ever played. TRAMELL: Hey, man, we gave
him a good fighting chance. JARED: That’s what I’m
talking about right there. TRAMELL: Gave him
some entertainment. JORDAN: I’m telling you,
that was the easiest round of Predator I’ve ever had. TRAMELL: Whatever. JORDAN: Really gave me a chance
to soak it all in though. Thank you guys. So both sides depending on
which faction you choose, depending on if it’s Predator
or Fire Team, Fire Team, we are looking at several different classes that specialize in various things
that will help you throughout the match. It’s a pretty well-rounded, best for beginner type
of class style. You got Recon and you
have Scout and Support, all kind of brandishing
their own unique attributes. As well as that, everyone has
access to all the weapons. So you can pick the style of
gameplay on top of the class as well as kit those weapons out
and make sure they’re ready for whether you’re facing the AI
specifically or prepping to go against the Predator
at close range. You got a suite of sniper
riffles, assault rifles, a few special goodies in there. My personal favorite
being the mini-gun itself. But when it comes time to
something up close, of course, the shotguns are always a great
choice as well as gear perks just to further tune your
playstyle to what you want in your loadout. And, of course, don’t forget
all the preferences that you can cosmetic out your character to
make sure they look unique and match exactly what you
want to show people when you’re on the hunt. Then on the Predator side,
kind of the same deal. There are some different
classes that will be available, and depending on which class
you choose will also affect your attributes going into matches,
whether it’s health, speed, melee damage. And it also has access to all
the weapons that you can use which also are very unique
to their certain use cases. And then in addition, some gear
and perks will further adhere to your playstyle. And, of course,
like the Fire Team, being able to swap between all
the different types of Predator and some masks, war paint,
making sure that you’re standing out and being nice and unique against everyone else
that’s out there. A lot of different options that
you can go through to make sure that your Predator is very
flashy especially when you’re ripping people’s skulls out. You want to make a statement and
show them that you have played this game a lot
longer than they have. TRAMELL: All right, new
guy, stick with you us. JARED: I tried to
learn from my mistakes, but this head just wants
to jump out of my body. TRAMELL: Please
keep it to yourself. Keep your head to
yourself please. All right. Everybody find some place
to get some mud on so the Predator can’t see you. JORDAN: That’s not
gonna help you guys. TRAMELL: It will help
a little bit. JORDAN: Not with me
and my keen eyes. TRAMELL: Your keen eyes. JORDAN: Predator has a nice
little isolation pulse ability that is only active for
a few short seconds. TRAMELL: Kill that boar
so he can’t eat it. JORDAN: These guys provide me
with their nice audio that you can see all the
way across the map. TRAMELL: Whatever. JORDAN: Someone’s not silenced. CHUCK: I’m definitely
not silenced. TRAMELL: I’m not silenced. I told you I didn’t
spend my chips. Hey. What are you guys doing? Stick together. Stick
together there, buddy. You guys are going
in loud, dude. Use a knife next time. JARED: The damage has
already been done. I don’t know what you
guys are trying to. TRAMELL: Just stabbed him. Just stabbed that guy. Keep it silent like we should. CHUCK: I’m going rogue. TRAMELL: Come on, man. You said we were supposed
to stick together. CHUCK: Zero to rogue
in like 20 seconds. TRAMELL: All right. I’m shooting barrels again.
How about that? BRETT: I found another tape.
I wonder what’s on it. TRAMELL: I don’t know. I’m picking up these jewels. Some dough. Spend on my cosmetics. Oh man. Who triggered the alarm? JARED: We’re not even
at the right camp. TRAMELL: These guys. JARED: At least I think so. Oh, hello. TRAMELL: Oh my god. JARED: That was a pretty
quick run-in right there. TRAMELL: I think I
need the support. JORDAN: I can see you. TRAMELL: Don’t worry about me. JORDAN: I see you
everywhere you go. TRAMELL: All right. How about this? Cause a distraction. JORDAN: Best course of action
is always about engaging. JARED: Why are there six guys? CHUCK: Triggered the alarm. TRAMELL: You’re leaving
all the jewels around. I just picked up some. CHUCK: What do the
jewels do, Jordan? Can you explain to us what
you can do with those? TRAMELL: I just picked those up. You don’t need those. JORDAN: Yes, through
the magic of — sorry. Get out of that situation. TRAMELL: Lots of jewels in here. JORDAN: So around different maps
there are collectibles that you can find, one of which
being the Vertanium, which is some rare
Predator metal. And you can use those to
purchase all the cosmetics that we have in our game as well. TRAMELL: I’m gonna buy
me a whole new suit now. JORDAN: A nice suit, all
these cool gun skins, and all the stuff — oh
is that you, Tramell? Yes. Come back here. TRAMELL: Help, help. I’m sticking together. Help. Where’s my team? Oh man. You guys stink. Come on. I’m right here. JARED: I don’t know.
He’s awfully close. CHUCK: Yeah, you’re
kind of loud. Why don’t you just die already. Oh no. TRAMELL: That’s horrible. JARED: He just stunned me. I tagged him guys. You know where he’s at. CHUCK: I’m going after him. TRAMELL: I’m running indoors. I’m scared. JARED: Grenade. BRETT: My healing hands. JARED: Thank you. TRAMELL: I need to get
this life juice in me. JARED: Inject the life juice. CHUCK: I don’t know. I’m alone. JORDAN: Chuck, come back. CHUCK: No, I’m running.
I’m running. TRAMELL: Don’t run off. We’re supposed to stick
together this time. JORDAN: I would focus on the
mission if I were you, Tramell. Last thing you need right
now is looking good while you’re failing. TRAMELL: I like to look good. CHUCK: He’s up there.
He’s up there. I just got blasted. TRAMELL: Don’t
get blasted again. CHUCK: Oh no, and I
dropped a grenade. TRAMELL: Come on, Chuck.
Plant the explosives. CHUCK: All right. I’m good. I’m good. I’m good. TRAMELL: All right
I got tow covered. He’s in the trees. CHUCK: Please cover me.
Please cover me. TRAMELL: He’s in the trees.
I see him. JARED: Is that one of you guys? JORDAN: It is, Jared. BRETT: Sorry. I’m trying to make up
for my past mistake. CHUCK: You got to tag him. BRETT: How do I tag him? JARED: Yes, if you’re ADSing
and you — TRAMELL: He’s in the tree. CHUCK: Oh, okay. TRAMELL: You gotta spot him
so everybody else can see him. JORDAN: Probably one of the
biggest things the Fire Team needs to communicate. TRAMELL: Yep. AI guy over here. F you guy. I just destroyed you. CHUCK: He’s up in the trees. Jumping west. There he is. TRAMELL: Get indoors, Chuck. Don’t stand in the open. CHUCK: I’m getting
under the rock. Gonna be safe. JARED: What the? CHUCK: I just got a snipper. Oh, right, I took one
of the PM heads earlier. TRAMELL: Where did
this guy come from? CHUCK: Who’s head is this? JARED: What’s going
on with that bomb? TRAMELL: You gotta
stand around it. It’s got a couple seconds left. Should I not be
by these barrels? CHUCK: Probably not. TRAMELL: Snap. More PMC dudes. There’s a PMC sniper over here. He’s taking some damage. CHUCK: Nope. TRAMELL: Blew it up. All right. Now what? JARED: Go, go, go, go. TRAMELL: Hold my six. I gotta get some ammo. Hey, wait. You guys stink. JORDAN: Tramell, off on his own? TRAMELL: I’m not.
I’m trying to catch up. They left me. You guys are the worst team. See, this is how people lose, hanging out by themselves
in the bushes. All right.
Everybody stay inside. JORDAN: I’m really just
looking for you, Tramell. JARED: Serpentine.
Everyone, serpentine. TRAMELL: He’s
throwing out gadgets. Look at these gadgets
he’s throwing out. JORDAN: Oh no. Why
did I just do that? TRAMELL: He’s got audio
decoys or something. Who’s killing me? JORDAN: Are you serious? TRAMELL: I just jumped
out of the window. JORDAN: How was
the chopper called. Who actually
completed the mission? Oh boy. TRAMELL: I gotta pick
up some more jewels. Don’t worry about it. Oh no! Come on. No. CHUCK: We’ll always
remember you, sir. TRAMELL: Don’t leave me. I’ll crawl in your direction. Help. JORDAN: The only
reasonable thing to do. Time to go take care of — CHUCK: You should just put him out of his misery. TRAMELL: No, come on. JORDAN: I don’t want too. I kind of want to let
him just bleed out. TRAMELL: No, don’t do it. Somebody come back and help me. I’ll give you all
the Vertanium I have. JORDAN: You bargain. TRAMELL: Come on, man. You still got a chance to do
what’s right in this world. JORDAN: This is a
trick shot right here. TRAMELL: Killed that action. Really? Tell my kids. ALL: Oh my god. JARED: You gotta be joking. TRAMELL: Yep, see. That’s what you get.
That’s what you get. JORDAN: Oh my goodness. TRAMELL: That’s what you get. CHUCK: Was that
even an honorable hunt? JARED: Such bullshit. TRAMELL: At least
I left my head. I got my head on my body. That’s exactly what you get. JORDAN: I don’t care if
that was a half victory. That was the best Smart Disc I
think I ever thrown in my life. JARED: Ah, man. JORDAN: Well, that
was fantastic. Thanks so much for
watching, everybody. We look forward to
you playing the game. We are extremely excited to be
able to show it to everyone, especially just getting
to sit down, play, have some fun and show everyone
what it’s all about, so. CHUCK: And we might see some of on March 27th, right? Or the 28th or the
29th, one of those days. JORDAN: Gonna be awesome. CHUCK: Or all three. JORDAN: Rip out
some spines for us. CHUCK: Exactly.
Today’s Friday. That’s usually when
I meditate a little bit and kind of clear my head over
this long, stressful week. It’s also kind of great
to embrace the quiet and embrace —
[ Laughing ] -Yeah, yeah, Da-da!
Yeah, yeah! [ Laughing ] -All new “Tonight Show:
At Home Edition” starts now. [ Laughter ] [ Laughing continues ] You have lost —
you’re upside down. You’re upside down.
[ Laughing ] ♪♪ -Hi, everybody. What a long week
it’s kind of been. But thank you so much for
tuning in and watching our show and giving to all these
great charities. A couple people have asked
if I am giving to these charities as well,
and, yes, my family is donating to every charity
that we’ve mentioned so far during these shows. And thank you so much.
Every amount counts. So I really appreciate that. And, man, it’s been a really
interesting week. Day 15, is it? Day 15, and I just want to say
first off, Hoda, I feel you, buddy. And everyone’s just showing
their creative ways of dealing with this and being so kind to
each other out there. And I want to say thank you
for that. I miss my crew and everybody
back at the show. But everyone helping us here,
I am so proud of this team. Thank you, everyone involved
in “The Tonight Show,” and thank you to my neighbors,
by the way. I’ve been getting a bunch
of drawings from kids saying that —
what their favorite bits are and thanking me
for doing the show. And today I got an edible
arrangement. I didn’t even know they do this. It was just a box of vegetables. I didn’t know they do that.
It wasn’t arranged at all. It was really nice, fresh
vegetables from Anonymous, from a neighbor that said, “Thank you so much
for the shows you’re doing. You’re making us feel happier
and calming me down,” something like that. Thank you for whoever sent that
and didn’t want credit. I want to give you credit.
Thank you so much for that. I appreciate it. Now I’d like to do
some monologue jokes that really go over — they go
over really well. So here we go. Should I — maybe I’ll walk in. Hey, everybody. Welcome to “The Tonight Show:
At Home Edition.” -Whoo-hoo.
-Well, it’s Friday night and the weekend is here. If you’re bummed that you’re
stuck inside, just imagine that you have two brunches,
a kid’s birthday party, and a dance recital to go to. [ Imitates cheering ] That is getting pots and pans
banging everywhere. People are applauding
for that joke. I really need to get out. I watch so much TV that
I’ve now memorized the entire William Shatner sleep apnea
commercial. [ Imitates Shatner ]
“William Shatner here. You know, I’ve been using
a CPAP machine for over ten years and it’s made
a world of difference to me.” Seriously, though,
I’m watching so much TV, today I accidentally called my
daughters Kendall and Kylie. I’m so desperate to get outside, when someone throws one item
in the garbage, I bag it up and take it out
to the trash can. BRB.
Be right back. I’m really running out of ways
to stay entertained. Last night I left our
back door open and prayed raccoons would come in. Things are getting a little
crazy at the house. This afternoon I went into the
bathroom and caught my Roomba in the dark
watching “Wall-E.” “Someone’s in here.” My Roomba told me to knock. I saw that Hallmark is giving
away one million free cards so people can send notes
to loved ones. That’s really great because
if there’s one thing we need right now, it’s people touching
licked envelopes. And finally, I saw a poll that
said men are less likely to follow social distancing
guidelines than women, which means a year from now,
the only people on Earth will be four billion women
and Dr. Fauci. That’s tonight’s monologue.
[ Laughter ] I got a little camera shake
there. Tonight’s guests are Tina Fey,
who I just love. I’ve known her forever now
from “Saturday Night Live,” and she used to write for me,
then we were “Weekend Update” partners, and then the rest
is — she’s amazing. I thank her so much.
She’s going to be talking about cityharvest.org. We’re also going to talk to
Chef Jose Andres, who is just awesome. He’s on the cover of
“Time” magazine right now for what he’s doing
with World Central Kitchen, wck.org.
That’s his charity. And we’ll be talking everything
that he’s going on. I think he’s going to be
in his kitchen. I want to quickly first give
a congrats to our pal. I don’t know if you can
see it here. Kamal.
Kamal had a baby boy. -Kamal, whoo-hoo!
-Kamal, we love you, guys! -We love you!
-Oh, my gosh! Congratulations
to the whole fam. Beautiful baby boy. That’s the best news ever, man. A baby just makes everyone
happy. So that is awesome, buddy.
I miss you so much, Kamal. I miss everyone in The Roots. In fact, we got together
and — through Zoom and technology — and made a little song
because right now I think everyone feels
like we’re a little stuck in the middle. Please enjoy. -One, two, three, hit it. ♪♪ ♪♪ -♪ Well, I don’t know
why I came here tonight ♪ ♪ I got the feeling that
something ain’t right ♪ ♪ I’m so scared in case
I fall off my chair ♪ ♪ And I wonder how
I’ll get down the stairs ♪ ♪ Clowns to the left of me,
jokers to the right ♪ ♪ Here I am, stuck in
the middle with you ♪ ♪ Yes, I’m stuck in the
middle with you ♪ ♪ And I’m wondering
what it is I should do ♪ ♪ It’s so hard to keep
a smile on my face ♪ ♪ Losing control,
I’m all over the place ♪ ♪ Clowns to the left of me,
jokers to the right ♪ ♪ Here I am, stuck in
the middle with you ♪ ♪ Well, you started out
with nothing ♪ ♪ And you’re proud that
you’re a self-made man ♪ ♪♪ ♪ And your friends
they all come crawling ♪ ♪ Slap you on the back
and say ♪ ♪ Please ♪
♪♪ ♪ Please ♪ ♪♪ ♪ Well, I’m trying to make
some sense of it all ♪ ♪ But I can see it makes
no sense at all ♪ ♪ Is it cool to go to sleep
on the floor ♪ ♪ No, don’t think I can
take anymore ♪ ♪ There are clowns
to the left of me ♪ ♪ Jokers to the right
Here I am ♪ ♪ Stuck in the middle
with you ♪ ♪ Yes, I’m stuck in the
middle with you ♪ ♪ Here I am, stuck
in the middle with you ♪ ♪ ‘Cause I’m ♪ ♪ Stuck in the middle
with you ♪ [ Song ends ] [ Applause ] ♪♪ -Hi, everybody.
Welcome back to “The Tonight Show:
At Home Edition.” Today is Friday, and that’s
usually when I, you know, check my inbox,
return some emails. And, of course, I send out
thank-you notes. And I have my buddies here
helping me out today. So I’d like to write out some
thank-you notes right now. If that’s okay with you.
-[ Fusses ] -Okay, buddy. Frances — -[ Fussing ] Okay, Frances, you know
your job, right? ♪♪ -Thank you, showers, for once being a routine
part of my day and now feeling like
a major accomplishment. ♪♪ [ Boos ] [ Laughs ] -[ Giggles ]
-Um… [ Boos ] Thank you,
getting food delivery, for suddenly making me feel
like I’m a spy intercepting an elaborate drop. “The hamburgers are
in the hole.” [ Boos ] “I repeat, the hamburgers
are in the hole.” [ Boos ] All right. Just press
the purple one. That’s good. ♪♪
[ Boos ] Thank you, journals, for now
reading less like a diary and more like a captain’s log after being lost at sea.
[ Boos ] All right. Here we go.
Just the purple one. Just this one.
-I got that. -Yep.
-[ Giggles ] ♪♪ -Thank you, socks,
for being the new shoes. You can pick up that one now. ♪♪ -[ Shouting ] ♪♪ -Who is that?
-Just a stranger. [ Laughs ] ♪♪ Thank you, journals, for now reading less like
a diary and more like a captain’s log after
being lost at sea. [ Drumming,
light laughter ] [ Drumming ] That’s good.
You can go to the next one. [ Drumming ]
♪♪ -It’s definitely Friday
around here. ♪♪ -Thank you, making shows from
home, for making me feel like I got a promotion from
talk show host to YouTube star. Don’t forget to smash
that like button. Next one. Thank you, couch,
for really stepping up during this difficult time
to become a desk, table, bed, bookshelf,
and trash can. Next one. ♪♪ Thank you, Dr. Anthony Fauci
listening to Trump, for looking like me
when someone suggests a 9:00 A.M. Zoom meeting. ♪♪ [ Murmurs ] ♪♪ Thank you, 40-minute limit
on free Zoom software. Seriously, thank you,
thank you, thank you. 40 minutes is enough. That’s good. Thank you, “welp,” for being the official slogan
of wrapping up a phone call during quarantine. Come on. ♪♪ Thank you,
virtual happy hours, for being a great rebranding
for drinking alone. ♪♪ And that’s our thank-you notes
right there. Thank you to Winnie.
Thank you to Frannie. And thank you to my wife
for operating this camera. We’ll be right back with
Tina Fey, everybody. ♪♪ -I got to catch up with one
of my favorite people today. From her apartment in Manhattan,
here is Tina Fey. Tina Fey, welcome to “The
Tonight Show at Home Edition.” I love you, buddy.
You’re looking great. Thank you so much
for doing this. I appreciate it so much.
-It’s my pleasure, pal. It’s good to see you.
-Great to see you, as well. And where are you?
Are you in Manhattan still? -I’m in Manhattan. We’re holed up in our apartment
here in New York City. And so far, so good. We’re doing what
we’re supposed to do. -How are the girls?
-They’re doing pretty well. They didn’t like
going outside anyway, so… -This is kind of
perfect for them. -We’re dragging them outside,
and they’re like, “Or… stay in here and play
all the screens that we want?” I’m like, “Fair enough.” -Your kids are pretty creative
from what I know. I heard that they were —
They thought of an interesting way
to have dinner at your house? -Yes, this was awesome, and
I wanted to tell you about it because I feel like
it’s something you can do — anyone can do at home
if they’re trying to fill time. My older daughter, Alice,
is 14 now, and she saw this idea online, so thank you to whoever put
this idea online originally. But she was saying, like,
we should do theme dinners. And we did one the other night, and it was
an airplane-themed dinner. And the thing
that was great about it was it took a lot of time,
right, for them to get ready. Also, I don’t know
if your girls are this way, but Alice was actually kind of
helping her little sister get ready for it, and the
little sister is just, like, so pumper when her big sister
pays attention to her at all. -Oh, yeah.
-She was just, like, pumped. And they dressed up like — Penelope dressed up
like a stewardess. Here. Let me find these
pictures. I’ll show them to you. It was really cute. Um… -That is hilarious. -She dressed up
like a stewardess. They did the whole like — I don’t know
if you can hear this. Like, a whole safety, uh… -…your chair.
If you lose air… -So cute. -…the air masks will fall
from the cabin above. -The whole safety thing.
[ Laughs ] -Oh, my gosh! -They turned all the chairs. They were like —
I’m getting a text. There were magazines
in the back of the chairs. -[ Laughs ] That is brilliant!
-They had — We had dinner. They — They served it on, like, big old trays,
which was good. My husband made — We had — well, we had macaroni
and cheese and spam, but it was on the trays.
-[ Laughs ] -And then also they were —
Because they were treating us like a really nice flight,
they were like, “Would you like
a glass of wine?” And we were like, “Yes.” And the great thing was,
afterwards, they were like, “We didn’t know
how much wine was too much.” And I was like, “Yeah, you
didn’t, ’cause this was…” -Yeah! That’s what
I’m talking about! -An ample first-class pour. -I want them at my dinner party. -She put an airplane window
on our TV, and I wore a sleep mask, and for the next 18 months,
that’s me. -[ Laughs ] -That’s Quaran-Tina. -[ Laughs ]
-Ooh, that’s pretty good. -Oh, also, by the way,
the last thing I’ll say about airplane dinner —
the other reason to do it is once your seat belts
are on and everything’s done, the dinner part is everyone
sitting quietly. If you have enough phones, everyone watching a movie
on their own device. -Genius. -It will be the quietest dinner. [ Laughter ] -It is absolutely genius.
-It’s great. Thank you to the Internet
for that. Yeah, the other thing that
we did, which was super fun — we did a thing — We did an online talent show
with my — our kids, a bunch of us,
over this very technology. We used Zoom, and so if you
have a Zoom work account, you should definitely abuse it
and use it for other things. So it was, like, my ladies,
Maya Rudolph’s kids, Amy Poehler, Emily Spivey,
Ana Gasteyer’s kids, and we — Again, another thing
that was nice about it was it took about a week. We were sort of like,
“Guys, probably this weekend, probably there’s a talent show, so you need to think about
what you’re going to do.” So there’d be times where
I would be screaming, like, “Get off of your screens! Go
practice for the talent show.” And it would kind of work. -Wow.
-So everyone really brought it, and then the other thing
that was super cute was we realized kind of like
in the half hour before that we could probably
get links to all — as many as we could
of the grandparents. And so right when
we went to do it, it was like —
My mom was able to get on. Amy’s parents. Emily Spivey’s parents
in North Carolina. And it was so cute. Shoemaker watched it from…
-No way! -“I’ll watch it.
I have nothing to do.” Friends of mine in Florida. And so everyone —
It was so sweet to see everyone, like, come together on the Zoom. And Archie Arnett —
Amy’s son Archie was the host. He did an awesome job. Rome Spivey did —
He did a sketch that was an old Emily Spivey
cut-for-time sketch about, like, an ad
for a barbecue place, and it was like, “Come
on down to our barbecue.” And he committed.
It was so cute. Ulysses McKittrick
did close-up magic. -No way.
-Penelope did — Penelope is using this time
to practice contortionism ’cause she’s —
‘Cause why wouldn’t she? Why wouldn’t she find a way to
make us nervous the whole time? So she does some, like — [ Laughter ] And the first 27 minutes — I recorded the whole thing. The first 27 minutes
of the one-hour thing is just old people not understanding
when they’re muted. -[ Laughs ] -It’s, like, Emily Spivey’s dad
being like, “Oh, I don’t know.
I think they started.” And then it’s like —
-“Are we on yet? Are we on yet?” -Mr. Poehler just like… It was the best,
and if anyone — If you have the capability
to do it, it was super fun. -Oh, that’s great. I think we have a little clip we can just show
right here real quick. -This is the end of Penelope
doing her — She did some contortion to “These Boots
Are Made for Walkin’.” The audio wasn’t terrific, but you can kind of
get a feel for the vibe of the FOTS,
the First Online Talent Show. ♪♪ -Bravo! [ Applause ] -Wonderful!
-Good job. [ Indistinct shouting ] -Yay. That was fantastic. Tell Penelope I said
she is awesome. She’s very talented.
Please tell her. I know with this whole
COVID-19 quarantine shutdown, Broadway has been shut down, and your show, “Mean Girls,”
is currently off. How is everyone doing
and dealing over there? -Yes. I mean, that was hard. That’s a whole huge industry.
It’s a huge part of New York. It’s a workplace
for so many people. I’ve been trying to do stuff
to help raise money for the actors fund in addition to the City Harvest stuff
we’re going to talk about today. But it’s rough because it’s —
it’s a lot of people. It’s a giant industry. But we are just all
kind of sticking together. Also our tour,–
“Mean Girls” was out on tour, and that is paused, and we look forward to,
when it’s safe to do so, hopefully adding those cities
back that we missed. But, yeah,
we had a meeting yesterday. It’s a very close-knit
community, and we just want to come out
the other side stronger. And when it’s safe to come back, we will be there,
and we will welcome you back. I hope there’s some kind of
like “I love New York” campaign, like the ’70s.
-Ohh. -We need that
when it’s safe to do so. We’ll be here and ready to… -♪ I love New York ♪ -Frank Langella
dressed like Dracula. -That’s right!
-But, you know, our “Mean Girls” Broadway,
our social channel, we’re trying
to give people content and let them check in
if they’re fans of the show. There’s always stuff
to see there. -Well, whatever we can do
to support when you come back, we will, please. -Put you in the
“I love New York” commercial. -Yeah. Exactly.
I would totally… Let’s talk about
CityHarvest.org. This is —
-Thank you. -Winnie does all these graphics. -Good work, Winnie. -Yeah. They’re getting smaller
and kind of less creative. -She’s getting tired of it?
-Yeah, she doesn’t want to work. She doesn’t like her new job.
I’m like, “Come on. Help me out a little bit,
please? Geez.” City Harvest. They’re fantastic. You’ve done stuff with them
before, haven’t you? -Yeah, I mean, I’ve just been
a donor with them before. And they’re a really
well-established charity here in New York City. I figured this problem
is so big, sometimes it feels good
to think locally. And I encourage people
to do so around the country to support organizations
near them, too. But, you know, New York City is
the epicenter of this right now. It looks calm
when you and I talk. It’s calm to see people
in their homes who are well. But there are so many people
who are in hospitals right now. There are so many people
who are toughing it out at home who are super-sick, who ordinarily would go to the
hospital, who can’t right now. And City Harvest is a charity
that gets food, healthy food to at-risk neighborhoods
and places where they don’t have great ways
to get nutritious food. And they’re currently
up and running. Their mobile markets are going. They’re still able
to be helping out. And so I think, also,
not just right now, but whenever this settles down, the economic repercussions
of this are going to be major, and there’s going to be
a lot of people, a lot of kids who count on their school meals
who are now homeschooled. There’s going to be a lot
of people who are in need of their services,
and I really encourage — I thank you for inviting me
to talk about it, and I encourage people
to donate. -These people are angels
that are helping everyone out. And right now,
if anyone’s watching on YouTube, there’s a “donate” button
next to it. So just click that button,
and you’ll donate. Anything matters. Everything. Just give a dollar.
Give 50 cents. It’s — I can’t even stress
how awesome that is that we can just do that,
and it will feed so many people. You have no idea. So thank you.
This is a great charity. Thank you so much
for doing this. I really appreciate it. And on behalf of everyone
watching the show, they all appreciate it, too,
so thank you. While we’re all quarantined
and cooped up at home. I’d like to play a game
based on a board game that you can actually play
called — Uh-oh. -Probably — I told you
there’s a Japanese water ghost in my house. -What is going —
-My house is pretty haunted, and just sometimes — Sometimes a specter — You can’t even quite —
Oh, there — Oh, gosh! -Wow! -Oh, gosh.
-Oh, my gosh. That’s freaky! -Help me!
-Hey! I don’t see anything, Tina.
I think you’re just — -Do you want to show…? -[ Laughs ] -Aww. Hi, cutie. That was a good — [ Laughs ]
That was a good bit. -She has a history
of being creepy around you. -She does, but all funny stuff
and creative stuff. -She came…one time,
and she drew, like, really creepy, scary pictures
and left them. Um… -It was, like, dead birds
and stuff, right? -She’s — It’s fine.
She’s a Wednesday Addams. -I love her. Oh, dude. Winnie’s
obsessed with Wednesday. All right. So, we’re
going to play this game. It’s something I saw on the
Internet, but it’s a board game. It’s called “Hey Robot,”
and what it is, is I have a bunch
of random words in a jar. And I’m going to pick one out, and then you have to ask Alexa,
which is right here, or whatever speaker
you have in your house — You have to say something to get
the robot to guess the word. You can’t say the word,
but you understand the idea. It’s like “Taboo” and all that.
-“Password” and all that. -Yeah.
-I have such a wimpy voice that sometimes
even in my own house, the Alexa ignores me,
so I’ll do my best. Sometimes I’ll be like,
“Alexa, set a timer.” And she’s just like… Like, “Alexa!” -[ Laughs ]
Slap it. Clapping. “Hey, Alexa! I asked you!”
All right. Ready? Here’s your first word. -Okay, so, the funny thing is I have to take my glasses off
to see better. -Oh, I’m getting there, too.
All right. -Oh, gosh.
-It is “pickle.” -Okay. Oh, gosh. -Let me know when you’re ready,
and I’ll press the Alexa button. -Um… Oh — Uh — Sure.
I mean, press it whenever. -All right. Here we go. Ready?
-Okay. [ Beep ] -Alexa, what’s a recipe for salted, marinated cucumbers? [ Beep ] -Okay.
For salted marinated cucumbers, I recommend marinated cucumber,
onion, and tomato salad. 2 hours, 15 minutes to make.
What would you like? Start recipe,
send it to your phone, or hear next recipe. -Oh. It’s your turn. All right. -Alexa, stop.
All right. Here we go. I’m going to — Oh, I know. Alexa, what does Vlasic make? [ Beep ] -Here’s something
I found on the Web. According to wikipedia.org,
Vlasic pickles is an… -Yeah! That counts! [ Laughs ] All right. Alexa, stop.
All right. Here we go.
Now let’s try another one here. [ Beep ] Uh-oh. “Saxophone.” -Okay. Ready?
-Yep. -Alexa. Alexa. What instrument
does Bill Clinton play? [ Beep ] See? They can never hear me. -She couldn’t hear you. -No, it’s my weird ghost voice! -That’s weird. [ Laughs ] -Am I not real?
Have I never been — Am I —
Have I always been the…? Okay.
-Try it again. Ready? Here we go. -Alexa, what instrument
does Bill Clinton play? [ Beep ]
First thing out of the gate! That is the best one yet! Crusher. Yes. All right.
-Thanks for your feedback. -All right. Cool. Very polite. All right. That was killer. Oh, my God.
That was the first — That was the first word
she said. You probably get bonus points
for that. I’ll give it to you.
-Okay. -Okay. Here’s my word.
Oh, man. Unicorn. Gosh. I have no idea. Um, um, unicorn. Unicorn. Um, oh, God. I’m going to
come off as an idiot here. Um… Alexa, what do you call
a horse with a horn? -According to an Amazon
customer, unicorn. -Yes!
I love Amazon customers! “According to an Amazon
customer, a unicorn.” -Think about that. They searched all of Amazon’s
customer comments that fast? -Wow. That is bizarre.
All right. Here we go. Your word is…
-Mm-hmm. Okay. -…”cowboy.” -Hmm. That’s — Okay. Uh… What is — Alexa,
what is the name of the job — -Alexa is me. I’m a virtual assistant who can
help you with lots of things. …alarms, weather reports… -Alexa. Alexa, stop. Stop.
-Alexa. -Oh, my God. Change your voice.
Maybe British accent, maybe? -[ British accent]
Alexa, what kind of doll is Woody from “Toy Story”? -[ British accent]
Alexa, what kind of doll is Woody from “Toy Story”? -Here’s something
I found on the Web. According to
OrlandoSentinel.com, Andy’s favorite is Woody,
an old-fashioned cowboy doll. -Yes!
-…toys. -For the win. Tina Fey.
That was worth 10,000 points. You are the champ
of “Ask Robot.” I love you, bud. Oh, my gosh. [ “Don’t Fear the Reaper”
playing ] It’s playing music.
This is crazy. -“Don’t Fear the Reaper.”
-[ Laughs ] Oh, my gosh! This is weird, right?
All right. Hey, pal, I’ll talk to you — I’ll talk to you
later this week or something. Thank you so much.
I appreciate it. Bye, buddy.
-Bye, pal. -Chef José Andrés is
nothing short of an angel. I love this guy
and what he’s doing. I got to talk to him today
in his kitchen. Please watch. Oh, that’s what
I’m talking about. Chef, my chef. Oh! That’s what
I’m talking about! -Jimmy Fallon.
-You look fantastic, buddy. I love ya. José Andrés.
-Jimmy Fallon. -You look great, buddy.
Oh, my gosh. Look — no, no, no, no,
no, no. It looks beautiful. -…my hair in San Francisco
in honor of all the nurses and doctors
that they are fighting this war. Look at it.
-Wow. I think it looks cool, buddy.
I think it looks great. Hey, I said —
last time I saw you, I said I won’t talk to you again until you’re on the cover
of “Time” magazine. And here we are. Come on, look at you. Cover boy.
-Yeah, I’m — I’m very humbled by it,
but it’s kind of — World Central Kitchen
is not about I the person, and you know it.
-I know. -The kitchen is about thousands
of women and men, right now in more than ten
different missions across the world, that they only have
one thing in their head, to feed anybody that is
hungry after an emergency. So that cover is
little bit unfair because it’s not
really about José. It’s about those men and women that are making it happen
every single day. So for me to them,
that’s their cover. -Absolutely.
World — worldcentralkitchen.org
is the website just so everybody
can see that. My daughter draws these up. -Wow.
-That’s not my handwriting. Yeah, she’s getting really good. -Are you paying her?
-[ Laughs ] She’s underpaid right now,
yeah. No, I’m not.
I should. I don’t want her to hear that. But what are you
making right there? -Well, I have my favorite things
in the whole world. We’re making a fried rice. -Oh, I love fried rice. -And this is a fried rice
almost in the honor of the men and women of China that they’ve been going through
this crazy mayhem with the coronavirus. And I know that people in China
are going to be upset that this
is not the real fried rice, but it’s my fried rice,
so I ask for forgiveness. [ Laughter ] And I think it’s a lot
of families right now that they’re going through
some uncertainty. Many, many people
are losing their jobs. And there’s going to be
hard times. But I think out
of the hard times we should be taking
the best out of them. And I think this is a moment
to be saying, “Man, if I have to be home and
I have to cook for the family, what I can do?” And this is all the vegetables
that you can think of. They’re super inexpensive. Carrots. You can be using canned corn. You can be using chickpeas
and green beans. -Hey, speaking of chickpeas —
-You chop it, and then you make a fried rice. -And just put — just
throw it in with a little oil? -Look at it.
A little bit of oil. I have ginger. But if you don’t have ginger
because it’s very fancy, put garlic. It’s okay.
You know, recipes are for you to do
whatever you want with them. Don’t follow the recipe. You need to write
your own recipe for success. So if you have ginger, put it.
If not, garlic. If you don’t have ginger
or garlic, you know what? You don’t put it. And then you begin adding
any vegetable you want. Hey, are you going to
help me or what? -Yes.
-Look, my daughter Carlota, Jimmy.
-Hello. -Hi, buddy.
Nice to see you again. -You too.
-My daughter, Lucia. -Hi.
-Oh, come on. -The vegetables.
Start adding and start moving. -You have the best two chefs. -You have a lot of —
and you start cooking. Can you smell it in your house? -Yes, I’m smelling it
already through this. I cannot see it. And you keep adding vegetables.
Hominy. I’m not going to give you
a recipe. If you like vegetables a lot,
put a lot. If not, put less. I can do something now,
you see? You can add some chickpeas
because cans are good… -Yes. -…when you’re at home
for long periods. -I have a lot of chickpeas
at my house. -Some corn.
Why? Because canned
vegetables are good. -They are.
-I’m French, but if you don’t have —
canned vegetables are excellent. Actually, they need love. They feel sometimes like
we’re shaming them. [ Laughter ] Vegetables in a can,
they have feelings too. -Oh, my gosh.
-Look at how beautiful they are. -Oh, my gosh, you guys.
-Look at this great — -You guys, you can get
your dad out of there. -They have feelings. The poor chickpea.
-Oh, my gosh. -They always say,
“Why people think like we’re not good people?
We’re good people.” -How do you live with this guy? How do you live with this guy
in your house? -I don’t know.
-I don’t know. [ Laughter ] -Oh, my gosh.
-Take a look. I know this is
an expensive machine and not everybody has it, but this is a machine
that makes rice. And when it’s ready,
it’s going to sing. -Really?
-I love — When I come home, I put the rice machine
up and running. It’s back there. And then when the rice is done,
it plays a song. -Really? [ Vocalizes “Twinkle,
Twinkle, Little Star” ] -No. But it plays a song. Look, it’s about to happen.
It’s one minute away. -One minute away.
All right. Do you have a tip
for making rice, by the way? Is it like — do you put your — how do you measure
rice with water? -I use that one because I like to make Japanese rice
and it’s more sophisticated. But between you and me,
you only need a pot. Listen!
[ Music chiming ] -It’s not loud enough.
-Doesn’t matter. You cannot hear it,
but I love it. It’s like —
-I’m dancing. I’m dancing.
I love it. I’m happy. -The rice is ready. -Oh, my gosh.
-Look at it. -Come on. -And then we put
the rice inside. -Look at this.
-Okay? So a little bit more.
A little bit more. Now sautee.
Look at it. -Oh, my gosh. Guys, get out of the way.
Get out of the way. There’s more fire.
Oh, my gosh. -Move, move, move.
-Ah! -Keep away.
-[ Laughs ] Oh, my — You’re going to
light the house on fire. -And then some soy sauce.
Why? Because soy sauce
is good for you. It gives flavor.
It gives salt. And then if you have some
leftover chicken, you add it. If you have some leftover
chorizo, you add it. If not, you don’t
add anything else. By the way,
I have a question for him. What is your favorite
kitchen gadget? -Oh, I brought it. I think it’s pretty interesting
but let me show it to you and see —
do you see this? -[ Laughs ] -Keep your daughter —
see this thing? -Is this to change
your lightbulbs? [ Laughter ] -What do you guys think it is?
-Is that a whisk? -That’s a whisker
for egg whites. -It kind of is. But, no,
you’re going to freak out. This is amazing.
So my father-in-law would find these things
in antique stores and refurbish them
and refinish them. This thing right here
is a hand mixer. Check this out. This is before electricity,
okay? So you see the grooves there?
Watch this. You take a bowl.
You push. -Oh!
-Oh! [ Hums fanfare ]
♪ Bum, bum, bum… ♪ -Isn’t that cool? -Fun.
-Isn’t that fun? -That’s so cool! -You can make egg whites
with it, whipped cream probably.
-Yep. -Or you can do anything else. -Yeah, that’s — I just
thought it was so rad. I didn’t know what it was,
but it does that. -You can do my…
-No electricity. …with it, probably.
-No electricity. And I can — yeah,
I can twirl my hair with it too. [ Laughter ]
-And that’s good for mustache. I’m sure you can play music. We know you like music.
-Oh, you know that. We’ve jammed out
a couple times. -You know what
my daughters and I — we’ve have been doing
at home some nights when I come back
from working around the city? -What? -We’ve been doing recipes at the rhythm of “Hamilton.” So we put the “Hamilton”
with permission of Lin-Manuel Miranda,
and then we start cooking, and we have to cook
in the same length as the song. -Oh, that’s a brilliant idea.
I was going to ask you if we can get into a little bit
about World Central Kitchen just so we can talk about it. What are you guys up
to right now? I know that you’re
feeding people quarantined on cruise ships. You’re feeding kids
school lunches. You donated N95 masks
to hospital workers. -We’ve been doing projects
on our own. We are in many cities,
many states. In others, we’re partnering. In others, we’re giving ideas to
very good people, men and women that they are
feeding food banks. They’re doing an amazing work. The school districts
all across America, they’re doing an amazing work
keeping children fed. The best of America
shows up in these times. And food, we are here only to be
supporting the men and women that they’re fighting this war
in the hospitals of America. Those men and women,
they need all of our support. So if I ask the cooks,
we can make sure that anybody hungry can have a bite of food
and that’s going to be a part of the solution,
not part of the problem. That’s what the food people
of America, we are here to do so that men and women —
-[ Indistinct talking ] The men and women
of World Central Kitchen — Oh, oh! Oh! The [indistinct] are
popping up all around the house. So the men and women
of World Central Kitchen, we’re here to support. If you go to wck.org, there you are going to see
what we are doing, the maps where we are cooking, and where other people
are doing. So to all the food people
of America, the woman that is working
in the supermarket eight hours a day making sure
that your family is fed, that woman is also a hero. The men and women that they are
bringing the food to the supermarkets from
different parts of America, those are heroes. It’s many people that we are
going to be playing our role to make sure that America
is taken care of while we are asking America
to stay home. To those men and women
beyond our nurses and doctors, we know they’re heroes. That adds to our part
of supporting their efforts. A big kiss to you.
Big thumb-up because you are amazing people
and we love you, and when this passes,
we’re going to make sure that every man in woman
in America is recognized for their
service to this country. -I totally agree with you.
I love that. How can people at home help? -Listen, there’s many ways we
can be helping and you know it. Obviously wck.org. You know, we are feeding
from children to elderly. If you want to support us,
it’s great. But sometimes if you cannot
because times are getting hard, there’s many ways
you can be supporting. If your mayor, if your senators
and congressmen, if your governor is telling you
to stay home, stay home. This is a great way to be
helping our nurses and our doctors
to fight this virus. We want to make sure
that the hospitals are not full of people. If they’re telling you
to follow — to wash your hands 20,
30 seconds, do it because this way
you’re not spreading the virus. It’s not a joke.
This is serious times. Follow the rules.
Follow the people that know. Follow Dr. Fauci, who is an amazing hero
in these times. -Isn’t he great?
-That’s what we need to do. Listen to him.
Don’t listen to anybody else. Dr. Fauci is the leader
we need. He’s the leader we want. And we need to follow
what he’s telling us. We need to follow those people
that are telling us this is a problem
but if we do what we have to do, this problem is
going to go away. So that’s what people
can be doing at home. Sometimes
just following the rules. -Chef, what can we do? You know, I love my restaurants
and I love my chefs. I love my servers. I want to support them
in any way I possibly can. I feel so bad that, you know, but I understand you can’t
go out to dinner there. But what can I do?
What can we do? -We talking there’s
millions and millions of food service professionals — cooks, waiters, farmers,
delivery guys. And I believe that
in these hard times we all need to recognize,
obviously, if you have — if you can be supporting
your local restaurant, many restaurants,
they have employee funds that they are
collecting money from guests. Me, I was able to be very lucky
with my partners, but I understand not
every restaurant can do that because restaurants, they have
sometimes very short profits. I’ve been able to offer
four weeks, full benefits, and full salary
to every single front and back of the house,
every single member. And if I can, I’m going to do
two more weeks at least. But other people cannot. So we need to make sure that as
Congress is passing these bills, it’s going to be other bills. And we need to make sure that
we are protecting the people, the small businesses beyond
we protect anybody else. -Yeah.
-‘Cause restaurant industry, 90-plus percent of the dollar you pay to a restaurant trickles
down across America. -Every single thing you do
from Instagram, from whatever, even hanging out
and meeting your family, your awesome family, you just
keep spreading that energy and that love and that spirit
because it comes through. And we need it right now.
And we need you. And you’re the greatest.
I love you. Thank you so much
for doing my show, buddy. The best. -Feed America. We need to remember that
because there’s many that are working
right now on the farms, and they are not recognized
by our system. They’re undocumented and those
are many of the men and women who are going to keep
putting food on our tables. When all this is over,
I hope Congress will recognize that once and for all and make sure
that we pass immigration reform because these are the men
and women that are going to be
feeding America during these next few weeks. Let’s make that happen. -We love you, Chef.
Thank you so much. Thank you again.
I’ll talk to you soon. Thank you.
-Good night. ♪♪ -Thank you guys so much
for watching the show. cityharvest.org. wck.org. My thanks to Tina Fey
and Chef José Andrés. Really, thank you guys
for watching this whole week. This is what the week
has felt like. Exactly — this exact thing. Okay.
Stay safe. Take care of each other. Wash your hands.
Don’t touch your face. I’ll see next week
with all new shows. I love you guys.
Thank you so much. Oh, my gosh. -Save yourself.
-You can’t go with me. Bye! ♪♪
For your average bike rider, this mountain trail could
look a little intimidating, but that’s not the case
for Naomi and Fenella, who, as you can see,
tackle every bend and curve like a total pro. I really enjoy getting outdoors and just riding with friends. I probably started five years ago when Blue Derby just opened. I love riding with my sister. They’re from Scottsdale in Tasmania, not too far from where the annual Blue Derby
Mountain Bike Race is held. And while they can’t get enough
of the sport, they reckon there aren’t
too many other girls giving it a go. There’s a couple,
not as many as I’d like. I mean, competition isn’t big
at my age. I’d love to see more women riding,
and it’d be just so great. It’s something researchers from the Menzies Institute of
Medical Research have also noticed. They’ve been working
on a big national study to try to work out
why more girls aren’t involved in action sports like skateboarding, surfing and,
of course, mountain biking. More than 80% of mountain bikers across our country are men. And so, when it comes
to getting girls involved, often girls see these sports
as being dominated by boys and men. And they often lack confidence
when it comes to, say, going to a skateboarding park
by themselves or going out on the trails
and riding a bike. Meredith also says that these kinds
of sports often involve more risk, and in the past that was something women were discouraged
from taking part in. Instead, girls were more likely
to pick up other sports, like cricket or netball. But she says that’s changing, as girls see more and more women competing at the top level
of action sports. These are sports
where women have been involved only relatively recently,
in sort of the last decade. And so they are lagging behind. And we now have
a really great opportunity as more action sports become
Olympic sports, and they become
globally recognised sports. This is a really timely opportunity
to make some changes where we can. Meanwhile, Naomi and Fenella
say there’s heaps of great reasons for girls
to get involved in their sport. NAOMI: It definitely
is a bit scary sometimes, but, I guess, overcoming that and then, once
you’ve ridden that really scary bit, it definitely feels good. I would like to ride professionally,
maybe when I’m older. We’ll see how it goes. In the meantime, they’ll continue
to hit the track at full speed. Ooh, nice move.